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Standing in the guest room, looking in the mirror, I can’t remember the last time I wore a suit. Can’t say I’ve missed it, but I want Cassie to have the wedding she missed out on. I would never change our first one, but I’m sure every little girl dreams of getting married in a white dress, surrounded by loved ones. It’s time to make that dream a reality.
“Daddy, look, I’m a princess!” Bessy squeals, coming slowly into the room, holding Eli’s hand as he toddles next to her, dressed in his little black pants, vest, and bow tie to match me. Bessy is in a pretty white dress, a gold ribbon tied around her waist and a tulle skirt that when she lets go of Eli’s hand and twirls around, it flares out, making her smile so brightly. The older she gets, the more she looks like her mother, which is both adorable and frightening. I’m not sure how I will cope when she starts dating. Maybe keeping them all locked up in our mountain home has more merit than I was first thinking.
As I look at the dress I ordered for Cassie hanging on the cupboard door waiting for her arrival, a warm feeling sinks into my bones. This is how it should be. The chance to show her how much I love her and make her feel as special as she is to all of us.
Kurt sticks his head into the room, in his matching suit. There are a few men out there who I would be honored to have standing up front with me, Badger, Ashton, and surprisingly even Tate, but Kurt was always going to be my best man.
“They're five minutes out. You ready?”
“Absolutely.” He leaves, closing the door behind him, and I take a moment to look at the two little lives that our love has created. Nobody is perfect, but these two adorable humans smiling up at me are pretty damn close, if you ask me.
“Are you ready to surprise Mommy, my gorgeous little princess and my handsome prince?”
“Yes!” Bessy jumps up and down, clapping.
“Mommy!” Eli joins his big sister with the clapping and jumping; he has no idea what is going on but loves to clap. He takes more after me, with fine blond hair, and some days, the seriousness in his eyes lets me know he’ll be a quiet thinker. He idolizes Bessy, and most days, she is so patient with him. But let’s see if that continues when she becomes a teenager. Little brothers I’m sure aren’t so cool then. I hope that no matter what happens in their lives, though, that they will always be there for each other. You raise them with all the values you think are important and just pray that when the time comes, they will know what the right thing is to do.
Hearing her voice coming down the hallway, complaining that she can’t see, makes me put my hand over my mouth, trying not give too much away from laughing out loud. Being led through the house with a blindfold on will not be sitting well with my wife who likes to be in control—well, most of the time anyway, but that is just something we share between the two of us behind closed doors.
This was a risk because Cassie hates surprises, and I get the reason why. She’s certainly had her fair share in life. But hopefully after today, she’ll see that sometimes they can bring something beautiful.
I place my finger on my lips to shush the kids as the door is opening, and Asha leads a blindfolded Cassie into the room. Not saying a word, Asha just steps back out of the room, closing the door.
She might still be dressed in a skirt and shirt that I see her in on a regular basis, but she still takes my breath away.
I need to speak because I don’t want her freaking out, even though I could stand here all day just taking in her beauty.
“Cassie, take off your blindfold.” The moment I start to speak, I can hear the emotion in my own voice.
“Noah?” she says in confusion as she slides the black cloth off her face. Her eyes open wide like saucers as she takes in the three of us before her. Her hand rushes to cover her gaping mouth, and she gulps at the air as I drop down onto one knee.
“Cassie, looking back, people will say they are sorry you went through what you did. But not me. I will never regret our life and where we have been. I never want to see you hurt again, but I hope you agree that it was not all in vain.” I can see the tears already falling down her cheeks. “The moment I looked into your bright eyes, you had me, heart and soul. I love your strength and softness, the sassy stubbornness and immense kindness, but most of all, I love the way you see me, every part of me, even the parts I try to hide. I love you more than any of the words I can think to tell you. Please marry me, again, and let me place this diamond on your finger that will show the world what I already know. That you are our strength, our home, the love of my life, and the beautifully adored mother of our children. How about we do it in style this time?”
I hold the ring box out toward her, but Eli is already trying to climb onto my knee, as his patience is gone. Bessy is bouncing on her toes next to me, waiting for Cassie to speak, although I give her five seconds before Bessy will be talking for her. She hasn’t said anything, but my nerves are finally settled and all but gone, so I’m not worried.
Just being near her, I know her answer.
Our love binds us together in a bond that will never be broken.
“Oh, Noah, yes, it will always be yes.” Her voice is wobbly with the emotion she can’t contain, tears falling faster now as she holds out her hand to me. I slip off the old plain white-gold wedding band and replace it with the two-carat solitaire diamond ring set low into the white-gold band so it doesn’t sit too high for her.
“I’m keeping this wedding band, and you can have it back once you say I do out there, in front of all our friends.” I slip it into my pocket as I stand, Eli on my hip and Bessy hugging both of us, and I place my hand on Cassie's cheek and kiss her like it’s the first time all over again.
“What have you done?” she asks me as we pull apart from the kiss that has reconfirmed our love.
“Just a little celebration for the most beautiful lady in a white wedding dress.” Stepping aside, I point to the dress that is hanging on the closet door.
“Oh, Noah…” The words leave her as she steps to it and runs her hands over the lace.
“It’s so pretty, Mommy. You can look like a princess just like me. Just like Daddy looks like Eli.” I love how in Bessy’s world we look like our kids, not the other way around. Life is so simple at their age, and I hope that it always stays that way, but living in my world, you know that it won’t.
“I’m going to leave you now to get dressed. Asha will be in to help you once she's dressed too. We will meet you outside at the altar, but please don’t take too long. I don’t know how long I can keep this one clean.” Eli looks up at me with the most innocent look. “Yeah, I’m talking about you, buddy.” Kissing him on the cheek, I bend to kiss Bessy, and lastly, kissing Cassie softly on the forehead. Taking Bessy’s hand, we’re walking out of the room when I turn one last time to see my wife standing staring at me.
“You are the reason I was put on this earth, bright eyes. To love and protect you all until the day I die.” Starting to choke on my own words, I keep walking, knowing that no more needs to be said.
Cassie will never know a life without love again. It’s my job to make sure of that.
CASSIE
