AllFreeNovel
Share Us
We wrap our arms around each other and hold on tight.
“Love you more than life itself.” His gruffness tells me that he is barely hanging on too.
Knowing we need to let go, he stands up tall and is still holding onto my hand. “I’ll walk with you as far as I can, and I’ll be here when you wake up,” he promises, trying to reassure me that, on top of the tumor, he has everything under control.
There was an argument between him and Tate this morning when he was refused the right to be in the operating theatre. Watching two alpha males take a stand is a sight to see. In the end, I had to calm Ghost and tell him we don’t want to draw attention, and it’s not normal for a patient’s husband to be allowed in there. We need to stay under the radar here, and as much as I want him there, he can’t be.
At times I think maybe we are overreacting. It has been years since everything happened, and Jason has probably long forgotten about me and covered up his tracks on whatever he thinks I knew anyway. What he doesn’t know is that I took two copies of all the information and only gave one to the FBI. That thumb drive has been in our safe all these years, plus Ghost now has multiple copies stored in secure places in case anything ever happens to the original. There are photos on there of all the papers that were hidden in the hollow book and everything I could find on the computer. They are only parts of a huge puzzle that Ghost has been piecing together, but I’m sure there is enough on there to prove it was him and not Camilla.
I’m hoping I’m right about the overreacting and that all we need to worry about is my health, and then life can go back to our normal.
Looking up at Ghost as we go through the corridor, I see Ashton standing at the door that says only authorized staff past this point. His smirk at me tells me he knows his partner too well. He is here to make sure Ghost doesn’t make a scene when they take me through the doors. I mouth “thank you”to him, and he replies back,“I’ve got him,”and I know he has.
The tears are slowly rolling down the side of my eyes to the pillow as our hands slip apart, and I hear his voice from behind me.
“See you soon.” And I have to believe that will be the case.It’s just a test, I keep telling myself, but that’s not so easy when someone is about to drill into your head and take a piece out of it.
The operating room is a hive of activity, bright lights that are hurting my eyes, and the clanging of metal as things are being placed on trays. I can feel my breathing starting to speed up and the nerves are racing all through me. This whole procedure freaks me out, but with every person around me a stranger, my panic of who they are and if they are a threat is sending me into a spin. I need to get out of here, I can’t do this.
“Just breathe, Cassie, I’m here with you.” Tate’s face appears above me, and he takes my hand, holding it tightly to his chest. I don’t know if he does this for all his patients, but I appreciate it so much. “That’s it, just slow it down. This will be over before you know it. I’ll have you waking up to that ugly guy that is pacing outside the doors.”
I can’t help but let out a little giggle amongst the tears. Tate knew what I needed, and that is to just focus on my husband and getting back to him before he pulls the hospital apart. Lord help Ashton and Badger having to put up with Ghost when it’s time for the actual operation that will take hours, compared to this one.
“Are you ready?” Tate asks, gently placing my hand back on the table.
“Why does everyone keep asking me that?” I joke, trying to make light of the situation.
“Because remember, no matter what, you are always in control. This is your life, you get to choose.”
He always seems to know what I need to hear.
“Then I’m ready.”
As the anesthetist places the mask over my face from behind and pushes the drugs through my IV, it’s the last thing I remember.
GHOST
“You need to try to eat something, Cassie.” The raw adrenaline coursing through my body the longer this day goes on is not helping me to stay calm with her.
“I’m not hungry.” She may be tired, but the stubbornness hasn’t gone away, that’s for sure.
“Don’t care. Eat!” What she isn’t counting on is my stubbornness is just as bad.
She rolls her eyes and crosses her arms over her chest but opens her mouth as I put another mouthful of the tuna bake they brought her for dinner. Why is hospital food always shit? I mean, who eats tuna bake by choice? That was what my mom used to cook for us, and just the smell of it makes me want to gag, but Cassie needs her strength. I need to be doing something, and even though she can feed herself, I’m doing it for her because it gives me something to concentrate on. And for Cassie, it gives her something to complain about.
The last nurse that came in to check on her gave us the message that Tate had been held up in surgery and would be up to see us as soon as he could. That can’t come soon enough. We are both going stir crazy in here. I could hack the computer system and find out the results, but for once in my life, I don’t want to. The fear of reading the words that will change our lives for the worse, instead has me just pacing the room or trying to watch the television with Cassie. I couldn’t even tell you what was on, and I doubt she could either.
“Have you even eaten anything today?” she asks. I can tell the grogginess of the anesthesia is starting to wear off now. She is asking questions she won’t like the answers to, so I speak in riddles.
“Yes.” It’s not a lie, but the single piece of toast I ate this morning, because she insisted on it, is not what she meant. I can go days without food if I need to. It’s not ideal, and it’s been a long time since I’ve done it, but I’m not leaving her to find food. Ashton keeps messaging me to arrange some to be delivered, but I refuse. He’s smart enough to accept my answer and not push it. The honest answer is that I can’t eat, I feel like I’m going to be sick, and this is not how I handle stress. All my life I’ve been the strong, stoic one, who can handle any situation I’m thrown into. Even when Cassie and I were on the run, nothing rattled me. Because I was creating the narrative. I knew what I was doing and had all the tools I needed to keep her safe.
But this, this is completely different.
It’s my wife’s life we’re talking about, and in a way I can’t control, and I fucking hate it!
My phone buzzes in my pocket, and I’m assuming it’s Ashton, but I’m sure my heart skips a beat as I see the message that tells me it’s time.
Tate:I’m on my way up.
