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“Yes, perhaps, but why now and why in secret? It doesn’t add up, Cassie. He can’t be here for any good reason. Surely you understand that.” And finally, the tears escape as reality sinks in for her. We have so much ground to cover, but letting it out will help her to digest the shock of learning that her father is alive, and he has come back to hurt her. If it was my family, it would have been so much easier to cope with, because I would have expected it. But from all the stories she’s told me, they were the perfect loving family, her mom staying home to care for Cassie and her dad traveling across the country visiting hospitals and doctors with new products in his work as a rep for a pharmaceutical company. When you are a child, you don’t always ask too many questions. My guess is whatever he was doing was not anything legal like her mom would have thought her husband was doing. It’s just not fair how much Cassie has had to go through in this life. For all the things she has suffered through and the strength she has used to push through the pain of loss and fear. But nothing will compare to the betrayal she is struggling with now.
“I need proof. He’s my dad, he wouldn’t hurt me…” Listening to the pain in her voice is so hard.
I hate to do this, but it’s the only way she will understand. Pressing the play button for the video to continue, we see him reach into his pocket and pull out a needle with fluid in it, holding her hand with the catheter in his other hand. From the angle of the camera, we can’t see what happens next, before he gets interrupted by the other nurses coming over to Cassie’s bed and talking. They are checking on her and looking concerned, trying to wake her. He slips the needle back in his pocket and leaves the room. I don’t know what was in the needle, but part of me is wondering if it somehow has anything to do with her having trouble waking up. Did he manage to get to inject something into her IV? I’m going crazy just thinking about this, but I need to keep my focus on Cassie right now. She needs me.
Looking up at me, the devastation is all over her face. Every memory she has of her father has just been dirtied by the video.
“But they found parts of his body.”
“I don’t know what happened, but my guess is that what they found wasn’t him. It was a staged disappearance, and sadly, I’m guessing your mother was murdered. I hope I’m wrong, but I rarely am. I don’t think the explosion was an accident.” I can’t be anything but honest with her now. Her life is on the line, and we need to work together to keep her safe.
“But why? My mom… she didn’t deserve…”
“No, baby, she didn’t. I never met her, but if she was anything like you, then I know she was amazing,” I say, running my hand over the back of her head, still so gently in case it’s tender.
“I promise I will get to the bottom of this, Cassie. For you and for your mom. If he did this, he’ll pay for it.”
I honestly didn’t know what to expect from Cassie, if there would be screaming or tears. I’m sure the anger will come later.
“How did you know it was him?” Cassie’s mind is racing.
“The eyes, it was like seeing your eyes in front of me, just older, but you get your eyes from him. We still can’t be a hundred percent sure, but your reaction just confirmed what I suspected. I know it’s hard, but I need you to think back to what he said when you thought it was a dream. It’s all we’ve got right now.”
The lines across her forehead deepen, and I know she is digging back into her subconscious and trying her hardest to pull the memory forward. Her telling me about the dream was the other thing that told me that the man at her bedside was her father. It’s just too coincidental.
Thoughts of my two children are in my head.
How could you ever do anything to hurt someone that you brought into this world?
I never contemplated children before I had Bessy, but my life changed in an instant when she entered the world. The love you have for them is like no other, and I would lay down my life for them, not want to end theirs instead.
How can someone be that evil?
CASSIE
There has to be a mistake. My dad would never do this. He loved my mom and me. Our lives were perfect. Nothing bad ever happened, and it was always calm. Nothing like Ghost’s family. We laughed together, spent so much time doing fun things when Dad wasn’t away. Now I can’t even remember how long his trips were. What was he doing when he was gone? Did my mom know where he was? What did he tell her?
The pain in my head is getting intense now, and I know it’s not from the tumor this time. It’s the emotion of finding out that my whole life has been some kind of lie. I thought it hurt finding out about Jason, but it was nothing compared to this.
What is wrong with me? Why do I have people all around me who kept their true lives hidden from me.
“I have so many questions.” I know Ghost doesn’t have the answers, but I need them. I’m going to find them out. My dad doesn’t get to play with my life and not tell me why. My anger is rising, and I can cope with that. The shock and disillusionment aren’t helpful to me now. I can deal with this later, but right now, I need to be strong. Stronger than I have ever been before. I don’t know where I’ll pull that strength from, but I’m digging deep and it will come, I don’t have any other choice.
“Me too. Let’s start with what you remember.” Ghost is being patient with me, but I can tell he needs to get as much from me as he can quickly, so they know what they’re dealing with.
“It seemed so real at the time; at least I know I wasn’t imagining it. I thought he was an angel and that I was dying. Because he told me I needed not to ask questions, to trust him when he comes for me. Shit, he said he’ll be back so we can be together for the last time. He’s going to try to kill me, isn’t he?” I feel the blood draining from my body.
“Not happening. As long as I’m still breathing, I will protect you!” From the force in his voice, I know he’s angry. I understand why but hate that once again something in my life is putting him in danger. It’s like I’m a magnet for darkness that Ghost is always trying to clean up while protecting me. I don’t know what the mess is this time, but I’m grateful I have my husband here by my side. The truth is, he’s never by my side, he is always in front of me, using his body as my shield. It’s something I’ll never be able to change about him.
But that’s what love is, accepting the person as they are and loving them that way.
Looking into Ghost’s eyes, I place my hand on his cheek. “You have a plan, don’t you.” It’s not a question, it’s a statement, because I know that before he told me any of this, he would be working out his action plan.
“Yes. But I need your help, and it’s going to involve being the strongest you have ever been in your life. I wouldn’t ask this of you if I thought there was a better way.” This is tearing him up on the inside. I can see straight through him when he’s trying to protect me. He can do it with no emotion for so many other people, but when it’s me, it is so much more difficult for him to put the walls up on his feelings. If I’m his greatest weakness, then I also need to be his greatest strength.
“I can do that for you,” I say, trying to sound more confident than I am.
“I know you can. I believe in you.” Ghost is struggling. We need to get past the emotion and onto the plan going forward. The rest of the emotional baggage from my father, his reappearance and what actually happened to my mother, we will deal with once we’re home, where he can rest and know that we’re safe.
