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Sadness for my mother and father, who lost their one true love. To my grandparents, who lost their only child. And something I never expected to feel, deep down in my soul. The pure, heart-wrenching sadness for myself, for losing my father.
“That’s true, we only knew her as Sally, but that’s the greatest twist in all of this. It was actually the actions of your mother that found us, not the other way around.” Just when I don’t think tonight can get any more intense, the next wave of confusion hits me like a brick wall.
“Wait, what the hell? What has my mother got to do with you finding us?” I sit up a little straighter, with energy I didn’t know I had left.
“She listed your DNA on one of those ancestry websites, where you track down long-lost relatives, a few years ago,” he says, looking at me and knowing I’m so confused.
“What the fuck, how did she do that? Like, what the ever-loving fuck! I don’t understand.”
“No, hang on,” Flynn says. “Remember a few years ago, when she said the doctor thought you might have some genetic thing, like your pop, and she gave you a DNA kit to do two samples so the doctor could check. I remember it, because I joked with her about what sexually transmitted diseases would show up. It was right before you landed head chef at work.” This would have to be longest Flynn has ever stayed silent, so when he speaks, I nearly jump off the step. But as soon as he mentions it, I remember that, and she came back a few weeks later and said everything was clear.
“Shit!” I don’t know what to say. I’m so confused.
“I think that might be a conversation you need to have with Sally, but no matter how it got onto that site, the absolute positivity of this is us finding both of you.” He rests his hand again on my forearm, and this time I have to admit it feels nice. Like he cares.
“Why did you go to my mother first?” I ask, trying to piece things together.
“Because she was easier to find. Still being old school, she has a house phone that is listed in the telephone directory that gave us her address. You, on the other hand, don’t have your full name listed many places so were harder to find.”
I had been telling Mum for years to get rid of that phone on the wall. The only people who call it are the telemarketing companies, or charities, or the oh, so exciting automated surveys for the government. But the real thing that worries me is that she is too kind, and the scammers that now target those phones would trick her into giving them money. Never in any wild irrational dream did I think a stupid old landline phone would bring us to this.
“Good to know, never get a landline if I don’t want all my past girlfriends to track me down,” Flynn blurts out to break the tension a little.
“Got a list of them, huh?” Broderick asks with a grin.
“Sadly, yes,” I say. “He can’t seem to hang on to them. But I’m not sure how many would ever want to find him again.” I can’t help but throw the smallest amount of humor at him.
“Now that’s my Nic. Always has the smart-ass answer. You back with us?” Flynn’s shoulders sag a little, like he finds some relief in seeing me not looking like I’m about to pass out anymore.
“Far from it. Just breathing is an achievement right now.” Running my hand through my hair, I realize how wet my scalp feels from the sweat of my panic.
“Do you want me to keep going or leave it at that for tonight until you talk to your Mum, and we can all meet tomorrow?”
“Christ, how much more is there to share? I’m not sure I can take any more surprises tonight.”
“I totally understand that. It’s not more surprises, just filling in the gaps. But one thing I do want you to know is that once I let your grandfather know I’ve found you, he’ll want to be on the first plane to Australia.”
“Not sure I’m ready for that,” I whisper under my breath.
I don’t know if he heard me or not, but his next statement puts me at ease and worries me all at the same time.
“He might want that all he likes, however he is an old man and can’t fly anymore. So, he will want you and your mother on a plane to the UK as soon as humanly possible. It’s been thirty-six years since he has hugged his son, and you are the next best thing. I’m sure this is all very overwhelming, so I think we are best to get together tomorrow to continue talking. You need rest, and like your friend said, a stiff whiskey or two.”
Standing slowly, Broderick pulls out a business card and hands it to me. “This has all my contact details on it.”
Taking it from him, I stare at it like it has the answer to my life on it.
“Don’t be scared. Only good things will come from all of this,” he says, placing his hand on my shoulder. “Try to get some rest and we will talk tomorrow.” Nodding at Flynn, he starts to walk away when I ask one last thing.
“What if I say no?” Because to be honest, I don’t know what the hell just hit me.
Not even turning back to look at me, he answers while continuing to walk away. “You won’t.”
And that was the first time I learned Broderick is usually right.
I know in my gut that a door has been opened tonight that can never be closed.
So, the only thing left is for me to work out how to walk forward through it…
