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“To sleep, Victoria. I just want to hold you.” And relief floods through my body. One, because I want him to step forward, but two, because I don’t think my body can take another pounding tonight, and I have yet to know if Nicholas knows any other way to fuck than to take me to pound town.
As I stand and step into his arms, he buries his head into my neck, and I can feel his breath on my skin. His whisper is all I need to know we will be okay.
“Be patient with me, Victoria. I’m trying.”
“That’s all I’m asking.” My reply brings a sigh from him, and his body relaxes that little more into me.
Pulling back, no more words are spoken as he walks me upstairs before stripping us both naked and laying me down so gently into his huge bed. It’s like lying on clouds with how soft it is.
Wriggling his body slightly to find his spot of comfort, Nicholas then pulls me into his arms. He locks his arms so tightly around me, like he has a fear I might run. And although earlier today I was so close to it, tonight that fear is gone.
Instead, a greater fear has replaced it, and it’s the one of what love between us would look like and if it’s even possible that we can make it to that.
We aren’t there yet, but I know we both want it. It’s the fear of that we both need to conquer.
Am I pushing us into something we shouldn’t even attempt, setting both of us up for a bigger hurt than either of us will survive?
Only time will tell.
* * *
The last few days have been a whirlwind, but not in the way I was expecting.
Our days are filled with working until Nicholas has had enough. Then we explore the farm—and he has been exploring me in all different places around the farm. I have never had sex outdoors before, but now I’m more than an expert at it. The risk of being seen makes things hot, but I know it would never happen. He wouldn’t let anyone see me in such a compromising position.
He told me this is the only place he feels safe to just be himself, and now I’ve seen what he means. Relaxation looks good on Nicholas.
It hasn’t taken away my grumpy dominant sex fiend. Thank fuck! But what it has brought me is the sensitive man who worships my body at night when we make love. I never expected to get this sensual side from him, but oh, how it sets me on fire. It’s like, ever since that night where he laid himself bare to me, he has let his body explore a whole other side of himself that he never knew existed.
We have found a balance between good and bad, and I never thought I would admit it, but I love both sides of us together.
The good is so good, but the bad is explosive, just the way I like it.
The more time I spend with Nicholas, the more my creative side races with ideas. I would never have been able to do this project justice without knowing the man behind the hotel empire. This is not just a business to him but an avenue for him to honor his family. And that was the part I didn’t fully understand until now. Because it’s the part he doesn’t share with just anyone.
He spent an hour this morning on a video call with Broderick who I have learned is the man in charge of keeping us all safe and protected. The man who organized for me to be watched until Nicholas came for me. And he’s the man who makes sure we can be here and not have to feel like we are being watched, a privilege I totally took for granted in my life, but one that Nic lost the moment his grandfather found him and brought him to London.
When I first met Nicholas, I had no idea how much security is behind him and the rest of his friends. Plus, the team in Australia, who unbeknown to his mother, keep a watch over her and his grandparents. He knows it is over the top and maybe not necessary, but he has more wealth than I can comprehend or want to know details. It’s not something that I care about, but there are people in this world who want to take advantage of that. He would never forgive himself if something happened to the people he loves. Besides the danger that wealth and greed bring, it’s the publicity and paparazzi that adds a whole different level of complexity. Imagine what it would be like to be in your eighties and harassed about your grandson who is on the other side of the world and just been accused of drug possession. That is heart-attack material at that age.
Last night I woke at two am and just lay awake with so much spinning in my head. What even is my life.
In the last two weeks, I have started a new job and hardly worked a day in the office. I can imagine the way Theo must be carrying on about me, which will be hard to cope with when I return. I met a man, spat tea over his expensive suit, and now I’m living in his wealthy estate. I mean, let’s not forget the trip on a private jet to Rome and fulfilling a childhood dream of making my wish in the Trevi Fountain. This can’t be real; surely tomorrow I will wake up and relive the moment of embarrassment on the train and life will just continue as it was supposed to. Plain, boring, and normal!
The smell of the amazing food that Nicholas is cooking in the kitchen reminds me that I didn’t wake up this morning on the train, but instead to some hot billionaire hotel owner and chef between my legs, feasting on what he tells me is his to devour when he wants. How can I argue with that.
I’m not wanted in the kitchen while he is preparing lunch for everyone arriving here around one o’clock. The guys have business to discuss and plans to make that are easier when they are all together. Honestly, though, I think Nicholas needs to see them. He is trying to show how calm he is about this investigation, but I know part of him is nervous. As much as I try to reassure him, I have no idea about the world he lives in, but his friends do, and that is why he needs them too.
He got me to ask Elouise if she could take Friday off work and he would have a car pick her up. I’m pretty sure she just pretended to be sick, but I don’t care how she managed it, I just wanted her here. He heard me on the phone to her a few days ago and could tell how much I miss her, and if I’m honest, I need to see her too. The guys might be his lifeline, just as much as she is mine. The phone calls have been full of shock as she listens, yelling when she tells me I’m crazy and should get out of here, to laughing and crying at the stupid things I’ve done since I’ve been here.
Who knew that when a horse lifts his tail while you are patting his ass, that means he is about to take a shit. Before Nicholas could tell me to move, the first plop landed on my feet, and I was so shocked I screamed, making the horse take off down the field as I fell sideways into a pile of hot horse shit. Oh yeah, just because I’m with Nicholas, it hasn’t stopped me from being a walking disaster. I hope he knows what he has gotten himself into.
My phone hasn’t stopped buzzing with messages since Wallace picked Elouise up. She keeps telling me how she feels like a princess, but she should wait until she gets here and sees the house and the three cars parked in the garage. Nicholas has a thing for his Maserati, but of course, also has a Porsche 911 and an Audi R8 lined up beside it. I mean, what the actual fuck. Who owns three luxury cars?! And that’s just in this country. I have no idea what he owns worldwide.
The surroundings will be enough to blow her mind, but the guys’ arrival will have her head spinning. There should be a rule about that many seriously hot men being allowed in one place at a time. She is normally the calm, sensible friend in this relationship, but I think today will test that well and truly.
She is only about twenty minutes away, and I can feel the excitement building as I walk back inside to check on my man. Yes, it sounds strange but very quickly that’s what he has become, and I’ll take on anyone who tries to tell me differently.
I’m actually nervous to see the guys again. Last time was so rushed and the world was exploding around us. And although I have spoken to them a few times on video calls, this will be different. It’s a more relaxed environment, and I’m bound to fuck something up. That’s what I do.
