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Well, a wife deserves some transparency when it comes to women texting her husband, doesn’t she?
Fuck. Yeah, no,anyway you slice it, this is uncool. Really not okay. Even though I didn’t evenfindanything that bad at all.
No super weird porn—no porn at all, actually, which, having grown up with five older brothers, feelsinsane.
No hookup or dating apps. No dirty pics or sexting exchanges with girls. There’s a whole text convo with this fucking Loraine chick. And apparently, Castle calls her semi-regularly, which makes my blood boil. But their texts are pretty innocent.
But then there’s thisTeaganperson. Teagan with the ridiculously perfect blonde waves, and this goddamn 2008 Taylor Swift country girl thing going on that’s so fucking cute I want to throw up. Teagan with the big perky tits and the perfect white smile.
Teagan who was texting Castle “so sorry I missed you the other night!!” Or “you owe me a big one!” followed by an emoji of ahorse,for fuck’s sake.
I meanJesus, have some fucking subtlety.
And my husband could have a little fucking class too, while we’re at it.
Iknowwe’re not really married, but still. Are you fucking kidding me? Never mind having an ounce of respect for me, has he thought for a single second how chatting away with a girl who by all appearances is even younger than me would look for our whole “image” thing if it got out?
I mean she even sent him selfies in different outfits, asking him to pick one “for the big date”.
Yeah, sit on a fucking tack,Teagan.
I scowl at my nearly empty glass before I bring it up and suck the last of the vodka soda down through the straw.
There’s a small chance I have an unhealthy grip on jealousy. Or, more exactly, reality. I mean…Ihaven’t, always. Hence the pharmaceuticals I’m prescribed that I’ve been taking since I was like sixteen.
But, regardless of the weirdness in my own head, that’s what pushed me over the edge today. I was already pissed about being locked up while he went out to his big important meeting, like a freaking housewife. And then seeing all those texts from Teagan?
Yeah, no.
So when Stavros texted me to see what I was up to, that was my out. I used Castle’s phone to text Patrick at the door, and was on my way in no time.
Stavros had mentioned lunch. But so far, “lunch” has been through a straw, on the rocks, with a lemon wedge on the side.
Real talk, I’m not that mad about it. I needed a drink to get over the embarrassment still choking my thoughts today following last night’s debacle in the shower.
Yes,hewas the one looking. Staring, actually, in a way that Castle’s never stared at me before. But I didn’t shout, or cover up, or even pretend to be mad that he was watching.
Ismiledat him.
Which of course shook him out of the moment and sent him stalking off. I’ve tried to convince myself that I didn’t scream at him or make a big deal of covering up because it would have made it awkward.
But that’s a big fat lie. I didn’t do those things because…fuck, I don’t even know now. Because I was riding the high of the wedding, however fake the promises? Because I was still smiling from the way he’d helped me pick up my meds without a trace of judgement or “oh, so you’re crazy” on his face?
No, I stayed where I was and smiled right at Castle becauseI likedhim looking at me.
Wanting me. Desiring me.
And then of course, I fucking smiled at him like a dork, and he took off to go text this Teagan ho.
Such a dick.
“Here we go.”
Stavros settles into the tall chair next to me at the hightop table as he sets our fresh drinks down.
“So,” he smiles flatly at me. “How’s married life.”
“Stavros, it’s beenoneday.”
