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I wanted to leave him more than the ring, but when I tried to write him a note, I couldn’t think of how to explain why I was doing what I was doing.
It was just easier this way. Or at least that’s what I told myself.
After Agnan found me in the rose gardens earlier, I had begun to follow him out as my guard lay unconscious a few feet away.
“I can’t just leave with you like this,” I warned him. “They’ll come looking for you, full force, and they won’t stop. You have to let me prepare a proper escape and ensure we don’t have the Royal Guards coming after us.”
Agnan had peered at me skeptically, the disbelief tangible on his face.
“If I didn’t know better, Mousie, I’d think you were trying to run back to your lover boy,” Agnan had said with contempt, the jealousy flashing in his eyes.
It churned my stomach, but I shook my head in denial.
“To what end?” I answered bitterly. “I have my memories back now. I know what I am.”
Agnan had found that amusing.
“No. I have to go back. You knocked out the Royal Guards. I should be there when he wakes because that’s when all the problems will start.”
“He won’t remember anything—” Agnan started to argue.
“He’ll remember that he’s supposed to be watching me—particularly when the king comes at him full force,” I insisted, and Agnan relented.
I formulated a plan on the fly, and with my mind racing, I put the wheels in motion.
When Jaylen woke, he barely realized he had been unconscious, and I made no indication of the time he had lost. Then, when he began to notice that he had lost over half an hour of his life, I ordered him to escort me to my old suite, banking on his distraction to make it happen. He was too preoccupied to question me, and I was free to shift into my mouse body as Jaylen tried to piece together the lost moments of his afternoon.
I thought it would be easier to escape notice from the north wing than the suite I shared with Zen, the traffic in the east wing far greater than that of the north. There were always extra guards surrounding our suite, servants coming and going to do Zen’s bidding. Evading one guard was easier, even in my mouse form. This way, they would think I’d left on my own and had not been taken, ensuring that Zen would not come looking.
The biggest risk had been leaving the ring for Zen to find before meeting Agnan after dark, over the castle walls where he was waiting. But I couldn’t just go without giving Zen some indication that I was okay.
But was I okay? Not really. I never wanted to leave Zen.
Right or wrong, there was no other option. I had no other choice.
“Grendel?”
Dammit!
I lay down quickly, hoping to pretend I was asleep, but I wasn’t fast enough, and the door opened, Agnan appearing before I could even close my eyes.
He smirked lightly in the moonlight, the beams filtering through cracked venetian blinds. “I had a feeling you’d be awake. You always were an insomniac.”
Not with Zen, I wasn’t,I almost retorted, but I kept my thoughts to myself.
“I was just about to go to sleep,” I lied. “It’s the middle of the night, Agnan. You can’t just come wandering into my room.”
“Since when?” he purred, ambling closer. In his hand he held a vial, wriggling it playfully, but I was too upset with him bursting in to notice.
I tensed, sitting up straight. “Since right now!” I barked.
A cold sweat broke out on the back of my neck, hearing the venom in my tone. I’d never spoken to Agnan like this. My companions had died for less—I’d seen it firsthand.
But he didn’t appear perturbed by my anger. “Oh, come now, Mousie,” he sniggered. “You’re not still mad about the whole memory thing, are you? You forget yourself sometimes, and it’s my duty as your guardian and protector to remind you.”
Fingers reached up to stroke my cheek, and I recoiled, lashing out at him with an open palm. This infuriated him, causing his russet eyes to blacken. He grabbed for my cheek, but before he could pull me toward him, a crash reverberated through the house.
Startled, he withdrew, spinning around to confront the flurry of footsteps racing up the stairs. My pulse was in my throat, the overwhelming aroma of Zen’s pheromones consuming me in a tidal wave before he materialized in the doorway, panting and panicked.
