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But Vorian wouldn’t know where I’d gone. He was here, and he was mine. And I didn’t need lavish. I wasn’t going to leave him behind, leave my “donation” behind, for Crux to do whatever he wanted with, like I didn’t have any ties here.
I did. I hadn’t asked for them, but I’d built them anyway. And there was no way I was walking away and pretending that there wasn’t anything in this lab that mattered to me.
I shook my head. “Oh no. You should all go, for sure. It’s small, and Crux is pretty awful, but I’m fine where I am.”
Lucas frowned. Hiroki looked between me and Jaime, like he was weighing whether they could pick me up and forcibly remove me from the room.
They probably could. I wasn’t a big guy.
But if I shouted, Vorian would come.
Only, if I shouted, they’d all be caught...
I hoped it didn’t come to that.
After a second’s consideration, the prince nodded, giving me a serious look. “Then I wish you joy in it,” he said, his voice low and serious. Right then, he sounded a lot like Vorian, but without Vorian’s quick, clever smile. “If you require help, do try to find me, and I will endeavor to give it. Anything you need.”
Weird, how this was the first time I’d said what I wanted—something insane, arguably not in my best interest—but there was a big muscled alien guy, respecting that. “Thank you, Your Highness.”
None of the humans were happy to leave me behind. They all leaned in, murmuring to each other. I caught someone talking about Stockholm syndrome, but I couldn’t place the voice.
And it didn’t really matter. I’d made my choice, and I was staying here. I’d keep my chance to see Vorian again, the chance to have the family I wanted and not have to live with the knowledge that my child was out there—not knowing who their father was, sending them out into the world alone like my dad had done to me.
A tiny room, a million Styrofoam bars—all worth a chance to take care of the people I wanted. Theideaof a future.
Right? Because I had to take a risk sometime, and I couldn’t think of anything more worthwhile than the feel of Vorian’s arms around me.
I stood up and took a couple steps across the little room, and put my hand to the panel. “Good luck,” I whispered.
And I slid the panel shut, not giving a single damn that I’d probably lost my mind and the best chance I had to ever get out of here.
CHAPTER14
VORIAN
Many times in the past ten cycles, I had thanked Lyr for the gift of my fourth mark—for the fact that Crux could no longer read my mind. Never before had I believed it to be the only reason I remained alive, but that morning, I had no doubt of it.
If Crux had known that behind my careful mask of indifference, I was laughing at him as he paced his lab, ranting and shouting his hatred for Kaelum, I had no doubt he’d have killed me.
Or perhaps, that would have been the final step—the one that allowed me to break free finally, and kill him.
I would never again be accepted in Thorzi society as the kind of monster who killed his own father. All hope for building a house of my own would die with Crux. But Beau would not abandon me, would he?
No.
Beau had proven for all time that he would not abandon me.
It had been the strangest feeling, keeping to Crux’s back as he went through one empty cell after another, all of their locks a steady purple to indicate that they were unlocked, each one empty, empty, empty.
Elation, at Crux being helplessly angry for once, instead of making everyone around him feel that way.
And also, as we went down the line, as my heart rushed and soared, a sinking feeling in my belly, because they were gone. All gone.
Except when we’d reached the last cell, with a purple light to indicate it was unlocked, just like all the others, the door had slid open to reveal a sleeping Beau.
He’d half opened his eyes and looked up at us, meeting my gaze and offering a tiny smile. “Morning. Breakfast time?”
It had taken every tiny portion of my years of conditioning, every bit of awareness of my father’s brutality, to keep my face entirely blank. Before Crux had been able to start screaming, or take out his anger on the one human who had stayed, I had spoken. I could not let him lie and raise Crux’s ire further.
