AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“Then we both have gaps in our understanding.” His hand fell, the heavy weight of his muscled arm on top of my thigh, but his fingers continued their gentle stroke, tracing the inside of my arm over the silky robe.
Sighing, I slumped back against the wall behind the bench and shrank down. “I guess I haven’t told you a lot about my life on Earth. To be fair, you didn’t tell me you had a brother.”
A hint of bright white teeth peeked out behind his lips. “I could count on my ten fingers all the times I have spoken to Kaelum in my life.”
“But still.”
Vorian glanced away, to the pool of cooling water and the screen beyond. His throat bobbed when he swallowed. “Crux forced himself on my mother. It left me with a monster for a father and a mother with little interest in me. My relationship to Kaelum is... complicated.”
“Jesus.” I reached for his hand, threading my fingers through his when they went lax and still against my own. “I’m sorry. That must suck, seeing half your family in a palace while you’re stuck with fucking Crux.”
A line appeared between his black brows. “I am a warrior.”
I nodded. “Sure. And plenty strong and brave and all those other warrior virtues. I get it. But that still sucks. You can be a warrior and still get hurt.”
Impulsively, Vorian rubbed his hand over his chest, the long scratches now covered by clean wrapping.
“You saw a doctor?”
His eyes cleared. “Kenosi took care of me.”
I rolled my eyes. “Of course he did.”
That was just like the man, to know how to treat and cover wounds to keep a guy from dripping blood all through the Thorzi palace. Hell, come to think of it, I didn’t actually know what Kenosi did. Maybe hewasa doctor or nurse or something.
“Now you,” Vorian pressed. “What frightened you if not me?”
My turn to swallow my nerves and avert my eyes. “Okay, so I told you my dad’s a jackass.”
Vorian nodded.
“A couple years ago, right before I was supposed to graduate high school, I, um, came out to him.”
“Came out?”
I sighed. Sure, yeah, on a planet with one basic gender and physiology, it didn’t seem like that would be a big deal. It was a planet of big warrior dudes who liked, well, pretty much anyone, as far as I could tell.
“On Earth, gender and sexual orientation is a pretty big deal. I’m gay. And, uh, well, gender’s a spectrum? And I’m a guy. But you know how Ree likes her red dress a lot? And the guys from Earth prefer to wear pants and shirts? Sometimes I like to dress like Ree. Like in skirts and stuff. And, uh, my legs look great in pumps, I think. Or makeup. Or, um, I used to paint my nails in my friend’s car before school and take it off before I went home? My dad thought all of that was girl stuff. He didn’t like it.”
There was a low rumble in Vorian’s chest then, and I decided there was no way in hell I was ever letting him meet my dad. Not even if we did have his grandkid.
I plugged along anyway. “So I told him who I am. Showed him, really. And he kicked me out. For a couple years, I didn’t have a house. A place to stay, or much of a family. I mean, there’s Petey—but that’s...”
Vorian was so patient, his hand warm and firm in mine, his eyes steady as he looked at me. But it didn’t help.
The tears sprang back into my eyes, and I could’ve kicked myself for being such a fucking sissy in front of him. My eyes fluttered shut, wet lashes brushing my cheeks, and Vorian reached out. He pulled me to the edge of the bench with a hand at the small of my back, wedging himself between my knees so he could hold me closer.
“That was brave,” he whispered.
I let out a broken laugh. “It took me seventeen years.”
Vorian scoffed. “I have been with Crux all of my life. Never have I been bold enough to be honest with him, to show him my truth by choice.”
With his free hand, he brushed tears from my cheek. “You are brave,” he repeated, “but I still do not understand what scared you here.”
My choked sob escaped. “I don’t want you to leave me.”
The tears flowed freely now, and I wanted to shrink into a tiny ball and disappear. Everything was hot, my racing heart making me sweat in the humid jungle air, drifting in because the far side of the room was open to the forest beyond.
