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I choke midsip of my water. “Yes, your treasured flower.”
Diana’s no virgin, but she’s picky as hell about who she sleeps with. She also likes to make me laugh by using the most absurd language to describe sex and body parts.
Her green eyes dance playfully. “Anyway, I need your help. Help me decide.”
“All right, let’s hear it. One of them is the guy from your squad, right? The stunt guy? What was his name again? Actually, I can’t remember either of their names. Wow. My memory sucks.”
“Nope, I’m not reminding you. I don’t want to bias you. Because the third guy has a really bad name.”
“What! What is it! Please tell me. Is it Roger? Biff? Is it Carl?”
“I’ll tell you at the end. After you pick.”
“You’re such a tease. Okay. Suitor A. The cheerleader.”
She nods. “He’s so athletic. So dedicated. Really funny. Cocky but not arrogant. Sex appeal galore. Only con is that he sings everything.”
“Like he sings a lot of songs?”
“No.” She groans. “He sings everything. Like, ‘I a-am go-ing to chew-ooh some guuuum nowwww!’”
Her musical rendition has me keeling over in laughter. “Oh my God. I love him.”
“It’s legit one of the most obnoxious things I’ve ever experienced in my life. Suitor B is an actual musician and he doesn’t sing nearly as much.”
“Oh, I remember the musician. He wrote you that song and tried to rhyme Diana with banana.” I firmly shake my head. “No love song should have the word banana in it. Also, your family’s from Savannah. Missed opportunity right there.”
“He’s not a great rhymer,” she concedes. “He’s also not very funny. He doesn’t get my jokes and he’s super intense.”
“The intensity is a musician thing.”
“I know, but I like a good sense of humor in a guy.”
“Is Suitor C funny?”
“Oh my gosh, yes. And he’s sort of dorky. He’s a physics student. Really smart, but not condescending. Super sweet. He’s not my usual type, but we bumped into each other at the Coffee Hut last week, and I was oddly attracted to him.”
“Con?”
“Sort of insecure. He constantly asks about my exes, but then gets pissy when I answer any of his questions.”
“That’s annoying, but at least he’s not singing the questions.”
“Very good point. Oh, he’s also a bit older,” she reveals.
“How much older?”
“Six years. He’s twenty-six. He’s doing his masters.”
I purse my lips, thinking it over. “All right. Based on the available data, I’m between Suitor A and C. I guess it all depends on whether you want a cocky cheerleader or a sweet academic. If it were me, I’d probably take a chance on the academic. It’d be a nice change of pace for you. And I bet he’s going to be good in bed. I have a feeling.”
“Intriguing. All right. Decision made! Suitor C it is.”
At that, she slides off the deck and plops herself into the pool. She instantly submerges, dunking her head in the water before popping up and shaking her ponytail like a wet dog. I get sprayed and start laughing.
“You’re evil,” I accuse, but the cool droplets do feel nice on my face. Actually, screw it. I adjust the strings of my bikini bottoms and then jump into the water too.
It’s heaven. Cold and refreshing, a nice antidote to the thickening humidity and relentless sun.
I float on my back for a few moments before remembering something very important. “Hey, wait, what’s Suitor C’s name? Spill.”
Diana does a slow butterfly stroke toward me. Stalling.
“Is it Carl?”
She releases a defeated sigh. “Percival.”
My jaw drops. “And he’s only twenty-six? What kind of parents do that to their kid? Does he at least go by Percy?”
“He doesn’t love Percy, but maybe I can wear him down.” She starts floating beside me, laughing to herself. “You know what? I don’t even care. I like Percival. He’s the one I want.”
We spend the next hour in the pool, floating and treading water and chatting about nothing. Then we spend another hour getting some sun, until my growling stomach becomes too difficult to ignore.
“Damn, G, keep that thing down.” Diana looks over and grins.
“I can’t help it. I’m starving.”
“Want to order some lunch?”
“I can’t. I’m meeting Will in town. Actually…” I sit up and stick my hand in my bag to search for my phone. “I should check the time.”
“You know how I feel about this Will thing,” Diana chastises. “You have no business hanging out with your ex-boyfriend’s friends.”
“He was my friend first.” I check the screen. “Shit. It’s almost one. I need to start heading out soon. Wanna join us?”
“Nah. I want to run through some of the choreography we learned at practice this morning. You should come back tonight, though. There’s this new reality channel on TV, and they released a roster of shows, and some of them are batshit. It’s amazing.”
