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“Oh, I see it!” Rae suddenly says. “That’s very cute!”
I grin and Liv nods, and as she accepts the ring back, she tells me, “It’s amazing. I love it so,somuch. Thank you so much. Which finger should I put it on?”
We agree it shouldn’t go on her left ring finger, and it’s actually a little too big for her right one. It looks nice and fits well on her right middle finger, though.
Then she puts a long, happy kiss on my lips that Rae says, “Ew,” about.
I tell the cute blonde, “By the way, I’ll do anything for you, too, Rae Elizabeth. Don’t ever forget it, okay? I love you and Annie both.”
Her wrinkled nose turns into lifted eyebrows and a delighted smile. “Okay! I love you, too!”
“Me, too!” Liv adds. Then, “Hey, open your gifts now!”
I obey the order.
She got me a small bottle of cologne, a cool black and green plaid button-down shirt that she thinks will look awesome on me (as she’s holding it up for me to try on over my t-shirt, I note aloud that the colors would look good on her, too), and a framed piece of paper she prettily doodled some romantic Hands Like Houses lyrics on.
I love all of it and am in high spirits until Rae presents me with my last gift, because Liv warns that it will probably make me sad.
When I open it, I find she’s right. It saddens me something fierce.
But I’m also incredibly touched, because my gift from Rae and Liv is a framed picture Liv took of me and Lolly on one of her last good days at Quiet Springs.
I miss her so fucking much.
I know she was already pretty much gone when she died, so yeah, that helps with the pain a little. But her disease was so motherfucking unfair. It changed her. Seeing this picture breaks my heart because even though she was having a good day at the time, I know she had far more confused, frustrated, and overwhelmed days at Quiet Springs than she did happy ones.
However, I also can’t help feeling cheered by the picture. She’s smiling like she just might recognize me, and my arm is around her shoulders in a half-hug. I’m visibly elated about her mood because it didn’t escape me how special that minute was, even though I can’t currently recall what all we talked about.
The picture frame itself is bittersweet, too. It’s a plain white cardboard thing Rae decorated with markers, glitter, and stickers, so it’s adorable; the word‘MOM’and a heart are at the top, which makes me want to cry.
Honestly, I do just that. This is definitely the second difficult part of the holiday, especially because this marks a week since Lolly passed.
I don’t break down completely, but I spend a couple minutes wiping at my eyes and sniffling—and being hugged comfortingly, of course.
Rae says in a small, sweet voice, “We made it for you a long time ago and now we hope you think it’s even more special.”
I nod and sniffle some more. “I do, angel. Thank you. Thank you both so much. This is awesome. You two are the best.”
She squeezes me around the middle. “We thinkyou’rethe best.”
“Yes, we do,” Liv murmurs before she kisses my cheek.
I kiss her cheek, too, and hug Rae back. Then I blow out a breath, take one last look at the picture, and tell the frozen image, “Merry Christmas, Lolly.”
They echo me. Then my phone dings on the floor, and Rae scoots away with an excited whisper about her tablet.
Liv gets my phone and tells me, “Robbie wished you a Merry Christmas.”
I text my group of friends Christmas wishes from me and the girls. Tyler and Matt chime in as Liv stands and starts picking up torn wrapping paper.
I get up, too, to help.
“Thank you,” she tells me with a smile, “but I can do this if you want to help Rae with her tablet.”
“You sure?”
“Yep. I bet there are instructions that one or both of us need to read.”
