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I’m too angry. Too scared. Letting Essos keep me in the dark for as long as he did was the wrong move, and I allowed it. I should have pushed back more, insisted that I stay involved, because the monsters in the dark were certainly not content to wait. Everyone else was making plans, and I squandered that time.
Now we have to play catchup.
CHAPTER10
Take two of going to the mortal realm has a much smaller traveling party. This time there are only four of us. Finn walks over to us in the dining room, his forearm bandaged and a pout on his lips at being left out. It’s been a week, and he should be healed. I’m not surprised, though. He was cut with the same type of weapon that left a scar on the God Supreme. The same type of weapon that killed me.
“You can’t heal it?” I lament, taking his hand so I can probe at it with my own magic.
“Nope. The God Killer blade takes and takes. It’s impervious to magic. It’s fine; people dig scars,” Finn teases with a wink.
“Who exactly are you trying to catch with that sexy scar?” Dion asks, but there’s not as much amusement in his tone as his words suggest. What happened scared him. I can’t say I blame him; it scared me too.
“I guess I have all the dick I could ever want.” Finn turns to his boyfriend and kisses his neck.
“That’s what I thought.” Dion gives a responding kiss to Finn’s brow.
“Stop. You’re disgustingly cute, and I can’t afford to throw up again,” I warn.
“You going to be okay?” Finn asks, cupping my cheeks.
I nod. “Yes, but I don’t recall other goddesses having this problem.”
“They didn’t,” Sybil says, approaching us with a tome in their arms. “I have my theories aboutwhyyou’re having this trouble, but it’s just that, a theory.”
“We’re all ears,” Xavier says, appearing in my dining room with the rest of us.
Sybil looks at him, then back to me. “You’re an anomaly. You and Cat are both goddesses who have lived in mortal bodies. I think it puts you at a higher risk of mortal-related weaknesses because your ovaries are just that—mortal. Over time, your power might saturate your eggs, but right now it hasn’t.”
Cat frowns. “This baby is goddess-blessed. No natural harm will come to this child.” The tone of voice that Cat’s using would scare me if it weren’t for the good of my child. She reaches toward my abdomen, and there’s a small spark as her hand connects. Cat blinks rapidly, like she’s trying to get something out of her eyes. “Sorry. I don’t know where that came from.”
Sybil gives her a smile. “You just bestowed a blessing on the baby.”
“Congratulations and thank you,” I tell her, sliding my hand into hers. There are tears in my eyes, knowing she’s done something huge for my child even if she doesn’t yet know it.
“You could have added in no harm at all, but we’ll take what we can get,” Essos says, trying to lighten the mood.
All attention is on Cat, and she squirms under the scrutiny.
Xavier takes the hint. “Perhaps we should stop dawdling and get this show on the road before the wicked witch of Solarem appears and ruins everything.”
“Yes, let’s,” Essos agrees, wrapping me in his arms.
I close my eyes, trying to welcome the weightlessness, but I hate it all the same. At least this time when we land, I’m able to keep my food down.
I don’t know what I expected to feel when I saw the place that I once called home, but this tidal wave of grief was not it. Essos holds me close as I mourn the life that could have been if Daphne Hale were just a mortal girl with mortal needs and desires. I mourn all the ways that Posey’s intervention fucked things up.
The street is quiet, and there’s no stench of death. It smells the way I remember, of freshly mowed grass and daisies. It smells like home.
“After what happened at Zara’s house, Kai and I went to each of your homes to provide a protective charm for a square mile around it. It’s not a lot of space, but we needed to do something,” Xavier tells me.
Essos cups the back of my neck and pulls my face to his chest as my tears start to fall. Three cold noses press against my legs, licking my knees just south of where my skirt falls. I was nervous when I met the mortal parents who created me, but nothing compares to having to face the mortal parents who had the biggest hand in raising me. They did everything right by me, and I was still a brat to them
“Whenever you’re ready,” Essos murmurs into my hair before kissing the crown of my head as my tears slow.
The truth is, I don’t know that I ever will be ready to face my parents, either set. But Solarem needs me, the Underworld needs me, and I’m going to put on my big goddess panties and get this done, because I’ve done enough sitting around. It’s time to act.
“You need to be ready to catch my mom,” I tell Essos as I extricate myself from him. Dave, Shadow, and Spot keep circling our legs. I didn’t call them to be with us, so I can only guess that Essos did. “She’s a fainter.”
