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“I’m your father, Nikki.”
I closed my eyes and imagined my dad, could feel the tightness of his hugs and remembered how I’d believed he could protect me from anything. I saw him racing into my room to comfort me after a nightmare, always a few steps ahead of my mother. I could hear Danawhining,You’re his favorite.I felt his arm hooked through mine as he walked me down the aisle.
“You are not my father.” My voice cracked, and tears threatened to spill from my eyes. I blinked hard to get rid of them.
“Your biological father. I didn’t get a chance to be more. Dom stole that from me.” His tone reminded me of Oliver’s growl.
“Stole it from you how?” My entire body shook. I stood and paced the deck, trying to expel some of this energy that felt like gasoline searching for a flame.
Hank cleared his throat. “You don’t need to know.”
“Don’t you dare tell me what I need to know.”
He took a loud breath in and exhaled. “First, let me tell you about how I broke up with your mom.” He patted the couch. I sat down next to him, sure to leave plenty of space between the two of us.
“For months, most of senior year really, I’d let her believe that once I got settled in New York, I’d send for her. She couldn’t wait, kept talking about how she was going to decorate our home, started to look for a job out there, inviting her friends to visit, picking out plays she was going to see on Broadway. The night before I left, I told her I didn’t want her coming with me.” Hank picked up his glass and shook it so that ice cubes clanked against the sides. “She was devastated. For her, the breakup came out of the blue, but I’d been planning it for months, working up the courage to tell her.”
My chest burned as I thought of my mom as the teenage girl I’d seen in the photo album and remembered the way she’d looked at Hank as if he were a deity she worshipped. I wished I had a time machine to go back and hug her or, better yet, warn her to stay away from him.
“Why did you lead her on like that?”
“I was an asshole, full of myself, had no use for the little town of Stapleton or the people in it.”
Hank isn’t the villain you’ve cast him to be. Give him a chance. Have dinner with him.My aunt’s words, which had always made me angrywhen she spoke them, made me angrier now. I’d been right to stay away from Hank. He was even more of a prick than I’d thought he was.
“So then why do you blame my father?”
“Dominic let Gianna believe he told me about the baby, about you, and that I said, ‘Tell her to get rid of it.’” Hank shook his head. “We never talked about the baby. I didn’t know anything about you. He asked me for a loan to get the restaurant started, and then he told her I gave him that money as a way to clear my conscience.”
I jumped to my feet. “He wouldn’t do that.”
“He did it, Nikki.” Hank’s voice was barely a whisper.
“I don’t believe you. My dad, he wouldn’t. No.”
Hank shrugged.
You’re a liar, Dominic.
I was so in love with you. That’s why I did it. Do you really think he would have given up his hockey career for you?
Memories of my parents screaming at each other after Hank moved back flooded my head. Hank was telling the truth. My vision blurred. I grabbed onto the railing.
“Are you okay, Nikki?” Hank asked. “Sit down.”
Sitting was the last thing I wanted to do. On the mountain, the lifts still chugged uphill, and bikes and carts raced down. I closed my eyes and saw crowded sidewalks, skyscrapers, neon signs, and yellow cabs zigzagging through bumper-to-bumper traffic. I could even hear the obnoxious horns. My life would have been so different if my mom and Hank had raised me in New York City. I would have had an entirely different lifestyle if my father had been a famous hockey player and not a struggling restaurateur. Part of me felt sad for this version of myself that had never gotten to be.
“Why didn’t you tell me before? Why didn’t they tell me?”
“I wanted to tell you, but I didn’t want to blow apart your family. Your mother and father, Dom, didn’t want you to know. They were worried about how both you and Dana would react. I’d already hurt your mom enough, so I went along with what she wanted.”
At the mention of my sister’s name, I collapsed against the railing. Not only was my father not my father, but Dana was no longer my full sister. This felt like the bigger loss because she was all that remained of my childhood family. She was the only other person in the world who knew what it was like to grow up in DeMarco’s Diner.
“I went along with it on the condition that I could be a part of your life. So I bought this house, lived here a few months during the year, and did some part-time work at the restaurant so I could watch you grow up, get to know you.”
Customers had always questioned why Hank worked at the diner. “What are you doing here?” they would ask. “You could have a sports talk show or announce the games. Be in New York with that gorgeous wife of yours.”
Hank always smiled when responding. “Helping out friends. I’m good for their business.” He would wink and walk away.
