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“That’s not true, Jess.”
Jesse’s breathing hurt. “All anyone ever said when I was a kid was ‘Mum woulda loved this’ or ‘Ellie would have been so proud.’ And I get it. I do. Of course I do…now. But I was akid.” He paused to draw a shaking breath and let it out slowly. “I felt like I’d come along too late to be part of the family.”
Silence like seawater filled the car. Jesse gnawed his thumbnail and stared at his lap. He was shaky and dizzy, but he was pretty sure this wasn’t all from the head wound.
“So, it’s our fault then,” Anton eventually spoke, his voice painfully even. “Me and Dad forced you into all this—dropping out of college, never holding down a job or a relationship.Wemade you break into that museum and hack those business tax records.”
“That business was stealing from their staff’s pension fund,” Jesse argued. “Trixy was gonna expose them.”
“You’re basically sitting there and telling me,” Anton continued like he hadn’t spoken, “that the reason you’re a total screw-up is all becausewemissed Mum?”
No. It’s because you couldn’t live without her. But I had to.
Jesse swallowed the words and the emotion that threatened to choke him. Instead he said, “I am who I am, Ant,” he said hoarsely. “That’s nothing to do with Mum. She wasn’t there, remember?”
“Yes, I remember.” His words were laced with venom.
Jesse rubbed his aching head gingerly. “Look. Working for the baron… It’s really not what you think.”
“And yet at no point duringanyof this did you feel like you couldtellme about it. Wasn’t that a warning sign, Jess? Wasn’t that a voice telling you how fucked up this all is?”
“It’snotfucked up,” Jesse pleaded. “That’s my point. I just knew what you’d say. Please, Ant. He’s not a monster.”
“You are joking, right?”
“If you ever met him, you’d see…” He trailed off. Anton’s gaze was locked on his wrist. Jesse blinked at the rope burn with a slow, dull terror.
“What’s that, Jesse?”
“None of your business,” Jesse said, tugging his sleeves down.
“Jesse.”
“I need to get back,” Jesse said, “Are you giving me a lift or what?”
“Get out.”
Jesse stared at his brother. Ice-hard hatred masked his face. “Ant—”
“Out of my car, Jesse. I don’t want to see you. I don’t want any calls from you. And you are tonevergo near my son again. Understand?”
“Ant, please!”
Anton reached across him and opened the passenger door. The cold air rushed in. Jesse swore then staggered out. His head spun, but he bent to lean back into the car. “Ant, if you would just listen.”
“I always knew you were different, Jess,” Anton said, eyes wet and his jaw trembling. “But I never thought you were dangerous, not once.”
“I’m notdangerous, Ant. I swear. You know me.”
“Shut the door.”
Ice water pumped in Jesse’s veins. His brother wouldn’t look at him. He shut the door, and Anton drove off. Jesse staggered aside before his foot got run over. He was alone in the hospital car park with his head hurting, his limbs shaking and his heart breaking in his chest.
“You look like you’re having a day.”
Jesse swore, clutching his pounding head. Trixy stood at his shoulder in a violet furry coat. Her black-painted lips were smiling, but her eyes were icy.
“Trixy. What the fuck?”
