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Courtney took a bite of her sandwich and chewed. “Are you running the trail rides?”
“If byrunningyou mean I take all the camper registrations and waivers, greet them, and wave to Jesse as he heads down the trail with all those happy kids, yes. Absolutely.” Beth grabbed her water bottle and took a long drink.
“It might be good for you to get out on one of those trail rides yourself,” Courtney said. She brushed several crumbs off her T-shirt and shorts. “You never do anything for yourself.”
Beth shifted. The very thought of riding made her palms sweat. “You know I can’t do that.”
“You really should.” Vivien paused halfway through eating an apple slice, dropped her hand, and studied Beth. “Do you ever miss riding?”
The question made Beth itch like she had hay down her shirt. “My riding days are long, long over.” She’d packed away her 4-H ribbons and shoveled every last remnant of barrel racing from her life before she’d even finished high school. A galloping face-plant would do that.
“You were outstanding.” Courtney swallowed a bite of sandwich. “I was so jealous. You were…fearless.”
“I was a kid.” A kid who could live life undaunted. Before enough years had passed that reality had sunk in. Mom was never coming back.
“You loved it, though, didn’t you?” Vivien asked.
Yeah, she used to love a lot of things. “Things change.” She had her dad to care for and, well, riding had been her thing with her mom.
And she wasn’t like her mom.
But camp presented her with a choose-your-own-adventure. A chance to move out of her dad’s house for the summer. To find her own path. To see what it might be like without the long-term commitment.
“Is Eli going to camp?”
The mention of her ten-year-old nephew touched a soft spot in her heart.
Beth nodded. “Yeah. Dylan thinks it will be good for him. He’s been a little withdrawn since Marie’s diagnosis.”
Courtney shook her head. “That’s so scary. I can’t imagine being diagnosed with breast cancer at our age.”
Her sister-in-law’s breast cancer diagnosis had shaken Beth too. Which was exactly why she needed this camp job.
Because thirty was only two years away, and she hoped this job would finally give her the sense of being someone instead of being the one who helped everyone else achieve their own dreams—and she’d still be close to home for Dad.
Beth took an apple slice offered from Vivien. “I think it’ll be good for Eli to get out of the house and keep his mind busy. Marie doesn’t want him worrying about her.”
Vivien smiled. “I think it’ll be really good for you to get out of your house. Get out of your comfort zone. Worry less about your dad.”
“It’s possible you might be doing a little too much for him.” Courtney set down her sandwich.
“I don’t do too much,” Beth answered. She couldn’t keep the defensiveness out of her tone, because no. She didn’t do too much. A lot was different thantoo much.
“Does he actually know you’re moving to the camp?”
Beth blew out a breath. “He’s still trying to talk me into commuting.”
“Of course he is—he’ll be lonely.” Courtney crunched a potato chip. “He’ll get through it, though.”
She was going to be lonely too.
Guilt sliced through Beth’s heart. But she still had a promise to keep.
I’ll never leave you.
Sure, the words had been spoken as a child, but they’d settled into the fertile soil of her wounded heart. Because no, she’d never, ever be like her mom, who’d abandoned them.
“Maybe this is what you both need. A little space,” Vivien reasoned.
