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Beth shook her head, afraid to admit the daydreams she’d had. “I’m not leaving Deep Haven.”
“Why can’t you?”
“This is all I’ve ever known. My dad is here, Dylan is here—plus Marie and Eli.” She raised her hands toward the cabin and forest. “This is here—all this. You know how long I’ve wanted this job, and I’m this close.” She pinched her fingers together.
Vivien nodded. “I get it—I do. I left and came back. Sounds to me like you’re trying to sell yourself on all the reasons you think you have to stay.”
Beth rubbed her palms on her thighs and met Vivien’s expectant gaze. “Okay, fine. Yes, I’ve thought about it. Wondered what it could be like.”
Vivien’s eyes rounded. “I knew it. Good for you.”
“But leaving Deep Haven would be leaving my heart. This is where my life is.” Beth looked down and brushed a crumb from her shirt. “Besides, you know I can’t leave my dad.”
“Speaking of where life is at and your dad”—Vivien stirred her tea—“how’s Operation River Cruise going? Did you buy his ticket?”
Beth laughed. “I’m not just going to pack him up on a plane.”
“You should—fear holds both of you back. I mean, I’m not a psychologist, but I have played one on stage.” She arched a brow.
“You are hardly qualified.”
“Humor me. You and your dad both suffered loss. And that makes change scary. But you’re here, at camp—living outside your childhood house for the first time ever.” Vivien tapped her nails against the tea glass. “And you’re both still doing okay.”
“I’m only twenty minutes away.”
“Still, that’s a start.”
“I miss seeing him every morning.” Saturday’s breakfast flashed through her mind. Without her around, Dad had made other plans. Which was great.
And maybe also bothered her.
“I’m sure you do. When my mom moved to Arizona, I was a little crushed. But I could have gone with her.”
“Why didn’t you?”
“Because that wasn’t where I belonged. Sometimes the easy thing to do isn’t the right thing to do.”
“I made him a promise, Vivie, after Mom left. I promised him I’d never leave him.”
“That was a promise made by a young child.”
“Now you sound like Grayson.” Beth shrugged a shoulder. “I meant it, though. I’m not going to be like her—and I don’t need to be. I have this.” She gestured again to her cabin. “This job is perfect for me, perfect for my life. My dad needs me.”
Vivien held up her hand. “I understand caring for him. You love him.” She pulled another grape from the cluster. “I just want you to think about if, perhaps, you need him to need you.”
“That doesn’t make any sense.” Beth piled a cracker with cheese and sausage and took a bite.
“Sometimes it can give us an excuse to avoid hard things.”
Like leaving home for college. Leaving with Lyle.
She finished chewing. “That’s not it. Lyle could have stayed—he chose not to.” And the fact that he hadn’t loved her enough to stay, well, that was a heartache she’d spent months recovering from.
“I did see your dad at lunch with Janet the other day.”
Oh. Dad hadn’t mentioned that. Huh.
Vivien grabbed a cracker, then took another drink. “Since you are planted in Deep Haven, tell me more about your job. Have you still been looking for an assistant wrangler? Someone to take the spot you’re filling?”
