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Callum raised his eyebrows. He hadn’t forgotten. How could he? Right now, he needed that money. He hoped to goodness Beth wasn’t going to ask for that money back. ‘I don’t suppose I need to remind you that it was Jack who insisted that if I was going to invest, I had to take a small cut of the profits. He made me promise. I can’t go back on my word.’ Callum felt terrible for not revealing why he needed to stick to that agreement.
However, as far as Callum was concerned, things had not changed. He still wouldn’t take a penny from their farm, other than that small percentage of the rental income. He’d rather sleep on the streets than do that – or sleep in a campervan, which was where he’d be tonight, and probably for the next few days while he sorted out getting the bookshop on the market. And as soon as he’d sorted his finances, and got a job, that money would go straight back into a fund for Fergus.
‘It’s guilt money – isn’t it? For what we did.’
Callum looked at her, surprised she’d broughtthatup. The thought had never entered his head when he had given them the money. In his mind, all he had wanted to do was help out his best friends. Although, looking back, he wondered if it was true.
At the time, Beth and Jack had been going through some financial troubles, and he had been afraid it might spell the end of their marriage. The farm was a mess. They’d bitten off more than they could chew; although Beth had inherited the farm, she didn’t know much about farming. She’d been to university and got a degree, but it wasn’t relevant. Jack was just as useless. And to top it all, they were getting nowhere trying for a child.
But all that had changed on Callum’s last visit, five years earlier, when he’d seen the state of their farm,and their marriage, and had offered them the money. They hadn’t been in a position to refuse – they had been desperate.
And then their fortunes had turned around completely. He guessed that being relieved of the stress of the farm haemorrhaging money and of all the loans and the mortgage payments had helped Beth to finally become pregnant.
Callum’s smile suddenly dissipated. He felt that five years earlier, in the midst of Beth’s and Jack’s marriage going through a rocky patch, he’d taken advantage of Beth. ‘I am so sorry. When you were at your lowest ebb, I shouldn’t have—’
Beth held up her hand to silence him. ‘It wasn’t your fault, Callum. Jack and I were … distant. We hadn’t … been together for a time. We were going through a tough time, as you know. I needed to feel close to somebody. And you showing up the way you did, out of the blue …’ She trailed off. ‘I’m sorry.’
Callum stared at her. All this time, he’d felt terrible at the thought he’d taken advantage, but he now realised that Beth thought it was the other way around.
‘Can you forgive me?’ asked Beth.
‘Of course.’ Callum was relieved they were putting that one-night stand behind them. Callum stared at her when something occurred to him. ‘It was never about me, was it? It was about that character I play.’Beth hadn’t slept with him; she’d slept with a fictional character she was in love with. ‘You’re in love with him, aren’t you? My character, Fergus MacGregor.’
‘I’m afraid so. He’s not real, though. I know that. That’s why I married Jack.’
‘Because I’m not him, really.’
Beth lowered her eyes. ‘I’m so sorry, Cal.’ She put a reassuring hand on his arm. ‘But you’re a good guy, and a good-looking guy.’
Not good enough for you, though,thought Callum. All this time, since way back when he and Jack had first met Beth hiking in Scotland on holiday with her girlfriends, he’d assumed that Beth was really in love with him, but that the reason she’d chosen Jack was because she didn’t want to be a Hollywood wife. She had said that herself to his face once, all those years ago, that she didn’t want to lead that life. But now he knew she’d only said it because she didn’t want to hurt his feelings, as it was obvious he was besotted with her back then.
He thought of the saying that love is blind. He realised that he’d been blind to the fact that if she had been in love with him, then she’d have followed him anywhere – the way Jack had followed her to a life on the farm. That life didn’t really suit Jack at all, but he’d made it work, for her – for the person he loved.That’s what love is, isn’t it?thought Callum.Being prepared to follow someone to the ends of the earth.
‘You’re going to find somebody, Callum, I just know you are. And when you do, don’t blame me if I feel a little jealous – or maybe a lot jealous.’
Callum managed a smile. She was still trying not to hurt his feelings. He imagined that she might be a little envious of the person who eventually stole his heart, but only becauseof Fergus MacGregor.
Unfortunately, as much as he wanted to, he still couldn’t be honest with Beth about his dire financial situation. It wasn’t that he thought they’d turn their backs on him if they found out he needed money. On the contrary, he was afraid they would do quite the reverse, and do something stupid, like re-mortgage the farm to give him back some of the money. And cancel all the holiday bookings in one of the cottages so he had somewhere to live.
On no account was he going to let that happen. For them. Or for Fergus.
Chapter 33
‘Hey, you guys!’ Jack appeared by the kitchen garden gate. ‘You’ve been an age. I didn’t think it took that long to see the greenhouse.’ Jack started walking towards them. ‘What were you doing out here?’
Beth quickly dropped her hand from Callum’s arm.
Callum turned around and caught a look on his mate’s face he’d never seen before – jealousy. He wanted to tell Jack that he had absolutely nothing to worry about. The trouble was, as Beth had said, he was a good-looking guy. And as Jack had said, Callum hadn’t let himself go like Jack had.
Callum stepped forward. ‘We were talking about therealreason I’m here,’ he called out. ‘I have a confession to make.’ He glanced at Beth, who raised her eyebrows, the look on her face afraid what he might be here to confess. She started to shake her head, mouthingPlease don’t tell him.
Callum looked at her in surprise. How could she think that? He would never do anything to jeopardise his best friends’ relationship – although he realised it was a bit late for that now; that horse had bolted. But even so, Jack would never, ever find out.
Beth wouldn’t tell him, and neither would he, so there was nothing to worry about. Callum whispered, out of earshot of Jack, who was making his way down the kitchen garden towards them, ‘Don’t worry. There’s no way I’d tell him. And I know you wouldn’t.’
He caught something in Beth’s expression. She should have been relieved, but she wasn’t – not at all. Before he had a chance to ask her what the matter was, he heard footsteps on the gravel path behind him.
Callum whirled around. ‘It’s about the campervan, Jack, and the photo of those two girls outside the bookshop. You see, I promised my dad I’d find them and give them the van. That’s why I’ve driven all the way from Scotland in it.’
