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“Okay.” I open the front door and take my bags from him.
“Will you need a lift tomorrow?”
“Yes, please.”
He nods abruptly. “I’ll get your car towed first thing, too.”
“Thank you,” I say to his retreating back.
Oh, God. He kissed me, and he hated it.
The knowledge is excruciating.
I unpack the gifts before showering and changing into my fluffiest pajamas. I climb into bed, trying to shut down my brain, but whenever I close my eyes, I relive that scorching kiss. It’s seared into my memory. It was a whole new experience. Is this all I’m destined for? Reliving the memory of the best kiss of my life? Okay, theonlykiss unless you count Anthony Lewis in seventh grade, who left a trail of snot on my upper lip.
Sadness blankets me, and the harsh reality that Ryder will never kiss me like that again settles like a rock in my chest.
Chapter Seven
Ryder
I try to calm my pounding heart as I knock on Charity’s door the following morning. I can’t let my loss of control change things between us. I need to be the guy I’m supposed to be in her life. Her brother’s friend. Her secret protector.Not the man who kisses her senseless under the mistletoe like I’ll never get enough of her.
Fuck, that kiss has messed me up.
I couldn’t sleep last night. Couldn’t think straight. Nothing makes any sense anymore. My feelings for Charity are fucking with my head, pitting my desire for her against my loyalty to Luke. I’m angry at myself for betraying Luke’s memory and my promise to him. And I’m angry at Luke for dying, for giving up his life for mine. His family needed him.
An image burns through my head of Charity meeting and marrying some guy, settling down behind a white picket fence, and having a brood of children that don’t belong to me.
The thought almost brings me to my knees. I don’t want her with another guy. What if he doesn’t treat her right? What if he doesn’t know she’s allergic to dog fur but loves cats? That she likes two sugars in her coffee, but only one if she has creamer? What if—
“Hey,” Charity says, opening the door.
Her eyes glance off mine shyly as if she’s also remembering our hot kiss. Dear God, she looks edible in blue jeans that hug her curvy thighs and a yellow T-shirt with a rainbow on the front.That’s precisely what she is—all the colors of the rainbow.
“Come in. I just brewed a fresh pot of coffee.” She turns and walks down the hall into what is presumably the kitchen, leaving me to follow.
Finally, I get my brain to engage and step inside, closing the door behind me. When I reach the kitchen, she’s busy pouring coffee into two mugs.
“Not quite Magic Beanstalk standard, but it’s the best I can do. We’ve got time for a quick caffeine shot before work,” she says with a grin.
Charity seems happy and relaxed. Maybe our kiss didn’t affect her as it did me. Her face is free of makeup, and her hair hangs loosely around her shoulders in soft, pale gold waves. I’m desperate to fist it in my hand and tug her head back so I can lick and suck the tender flesh of her throat.
“Is everything okay?” she asks, noticing I haven’t moved from the kitchen doorway.
No. Everything is not okay. Not since I tasted her sweet lips last night. It’s stirred something primal and possessive in me. Something that wants to feast on her beautiful, perfect soul. Something that wants to make her mine.
I hear a rumble, and it takes me a minute to realize it’s coming from me. Charity pauses as she pulls the chair from beneath the small round table, her bright blue eyes wide and questioning.
I close the distance between us in two long strides, yank her against me, and seal my lips to hers.
* * *
Charity
Something shifted between us after that kiss last night. It was in Ryder’s dark eyes when I opened the door, which burned with an emotion I’d never seen in them before.
And now . . . now he’s kissing me like he needs me to survive. His hands drop to my ass, and he squeezes before dragging me against his hard body.
