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I hold myself back all of five minutes before launching myself at the love of my fucking life.
Jackson catches me with a laugh, my legs flailing as he swings me around. “Congratulations,” I sniffle into his neck, clutching tight at the back of his shirt.
“Thank you, sweetheart.”
He tries to put me down but I don't let him go, not yet. “I'm so proud of you.”
Fingers tug on my hair gently, pulling my head back so I see his smile just before it descends on me. His lips caress mine softly, and I clutch him tightly, savoring him. I'm going to savor him all summer long because while I know I'll be in Sun Valley next fall, I have no idea where he'll be.
“Can you two detach for, like, two minutes so we can get a picture?”
Lux applauds sarcastically when Jackson reluctantly puts me down, scowling at his sister. Over her shoulder, Nick smirks at us, the camera Amelia's been guarding with her life all day slung around his neck and poised in our direction.
I try to step away, assuming they're angling for a family photo, but Jackson slings an arm around my waist and pulls me in, refusing to let me slink away. Tears that have been threatening to spill all day sting my eyes but I swallow them down. The girls fill in around us, Lux brushing against my other side, her fingers pinching my arm.
“Smile nice and big, okay?” she whispers in my ear, throwing her arm around my shoulders. “This one's going on the window sill.”
* * *
Despite the fact the sweltering June heat has well and truly set in, I swear the guys' house feels colder than usual. Maybe it's just me being dramatic because this is quite possibly the last time we'll all be in this house together but I'm positive there's a weird chill in the air.
I'm not the only one who's feeling it. Everyone is weirdly sombre, despite the fact we're supposed to be celebrating. Amelia's bottom lip has a constant wobble to it as she peers around the house that pretty much changed her life.
I know how she feels.
Everywhere I look, I'm assaulted by a different memory.
Downstairs is bad but upstairs is worse, and maybe, just maybe, when I slip into my new room, a few tears fall.
It's well and truly my room at this point; there's more of my stuff in here than Jackson's. It makes me sniff a little harder, seeing our stuff together. My mug next to his on the desk cluttered with my textbooks and Jackson's sketchbooks. My perfumes on the chest of drawers next to his cologne. My clothes spilling out of our closet, very much encroaching on what's supposed to be his side.
I swipe hastily underneath my eyes when the door creaks open and Amelia creeps into the room. She pauses in the doorway, that damn wobbly bottom lip and tear-stained cheeks pulling at my heartstrings. “Cass' room is so empty.”
I collapse on the bed and pat the spot beside me. “C'mere, crybaby.”
Red-rimmed, unnaturally green eyes roll, a fist jutting out to catch my shoulder. “Shut up. I'm allowed to be emotional.”
“You're gonna cry yourself into severe dehydration.”
“Amen to that,” Ben chimes in as he shoulders his way into the room, Kate hot on his heels. The latter pats my head affectionately as she perches beside me, linking her hand with mine and tugging it onto her lap, her head falling on my shoulder. Ben eyes Amelia suspiciously as he chucks himself on the bed too. “Are you pregnant or something? You're extra weepy lately.”
“No!” Amelia splutters, whacking the back of his calf. “God, please don't joke like that around Nick. We'd never have sex again.”
Kate, Ben, and I all snort simultaneously. “Please, the day that man puts a baby in you is gonna be the best day of his life.”
“Have you seen him around Lux and the bump?” Kate reaches over to nudge our blushing red-headed friend. “I give him a year before he starts dropping hints.”
“A year?” I join in, lips pursed to hide my smile. “Six months, tops.”
Ben rolls onto his stomach, propping his chin in his hand and regarding Amelia mischievously. “I say she's knocked up before the summer ends.”
“I hate all of you,” Amelia mutters, flopping onto her back before digging her nails into my thigh. “And you're one to talk. Jackson's gonna take one look at Baby Jackson and go full-dad mode.”
I huff a laugh; Baby Jackson isn't even here yet and Big Jackson has already gone full-dad mode. Well, full-uncle mode.
Dadis a long, long way off. I'm twenty-one, for God's sake, and I haven't even graduated college. I've barely gotten my life back on track after what I've chosen to refer to as The Dark Months. And Jackson and I only just got back together.
When I tell my friends as much, Ben pats my shoulder in an almost pitying gesture. “Lu, sweetie, I hate to break it to you, but I think you're gonna take one look at that man with a baby strapped to his chest and your ovaries are gonna start crying.”
