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How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to break the ice!The amusing message popped up on my screen one evening while I was shovelling pasta into my mouth at dinner.
I had frowned at my tablet, who was this person? Usually alphas could only message us once we approved their profiles, and I didn’t recall approving this one. His cheeky message had caught my attention though.
Hello stranger, I don’t recall approving you…
I should be offended that you don’t remember me, but I was also surprised to find you pop up on my screen as available to message.
Hmmm, computer glitch?
A happy one for me, unless you want to block me. I wouldn’t blame you, I’m a terror, at least according to my pack.
I smiled, my forkful of pasta halfway to my mouth. Usually alphas were immediately telling me all their positive traits, like how much they could give me and how amazing they were, all in an attempt to make me interested and pick them to talk to. It was actually quite the turn off.
A terror? How so?I replied, finding myself eagerly awaiting an answer, the food an afterthought.
I steal all their gummy bears.
I grinned, shaking my head as I typed my answer. He was clearly mischievous.Oh no, that is a grievous offence. Are we talking the cheap off-brand gummy bears, or the nice branded ones?
I am a classy gentleman, only the top name brand for me.
I’m jealous. My favourite brand of gummy bears was discontinued last year, the brown sugar ones, and I still crave them with a vengeance.
Ouch! If you let me know your name, I could always see if I could find and send you some. It’s weird chatting with Omega1327. I’m assuming you have a name?
Those gummy bears are GONE. Trust me, I’ve searched the internet a million times over at this point. You don’t mess with an omega and her sweet tooth. And the name’s Lavender. What’s yours?
Lavender, that’s pretty. I’m Archer.
I noted his name, swiping from the chat to the alpha profiles. Glancing through quickly to try and find it, surely his pack was in here somewhere?
I’m trying to find your profile and failing! You could be a serial killer for all I know.
Don’t worry Love, I’m a cereal killer, not a serial killer :D
I snorted with laughter, making a few people glance over at me. I probably looked insane, grinning maniacally at my tablet. What could I say? Dad humour was hot.
Look under my pack name, Rowe. Our pack head is a grumpy moron called Gage.
Flicking back and searching just for the pack name I got a hit. Pack Rowe. Four members with a good reputation. Small town, hard working alphas from the looks of it. A butcher, a computer analyst, a security expert and a veterinarian. They must have saved for a while to afford the Haven fees, which probably meant they were serious about looking for an omega, which made me smile.
There was only one picture on their profile, which was a little odd. It was four alphas squished together wearing fake moustaches. The one on the far left with shaggy blonde hair was taking the photo. It was a far cry from the usual professional photos, I suspected the cheeky alpha I was currently talking to may have instigated this, and butterflies erupted in my stomach at that idea.
What do you know, there you are! You look adorable in your picture by the way, which one is you?I replied. They were an official pack, available to talk to and they had a sense of humour, clearly. Immediately I found myself sucked into the conversation.
Dark hair and glasses. I think the 70’s moustache look suits me well
You can totally pull it off! Though you’re looking a little Richard Chase with it…
Richard Chase?
I cringed. I’d typed before I thought. Usually I would avoid the gorier topics I liked to talk about, but taking a moment to look at the screen I decided to throw caution to the wind and just say the things I wanted to say. What was the worst that could happen, I would be blocked? That had already happened plenty, so I wasn’t afraid of it.
Serial killer, nicknamed the Vampire of Sacramento because he drank his victims blood.
Well I don’t want to be giving off that impression! How on earth do you know about 70’s serial killers?
True crime isn’t a hobby, it’s a lifestyle. The freakier it is, the more intrigued I am. I go to sleep watching murder documentaries.
