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‘You have been improving?’ Xavier said it as a question. It was questionable.
‘Well, they say every day’s a school day.’
‘Do they?’ Liv asked.
‘Who are they?’ Xavier added.
We crammed onto the gondola and were whisked off, high above the village which glinted and glowed in the wintery light. Genevieve and Luca weren’t planning a visit this weekend, so we had the whole Verbier playground to ourselves. The cable car came to a juddery halt as we shuffled out, squished between the crowds. I was still sporting Auntie Pam’s salopettes, which weren’t doing much for my street cred, but then neither were my terrible attempts at snowboarding. The three of us walked to the top of the blue run and sat down to strap on our snowboards. At least I could now do this part.
‘See you down there,’ Liv shouted, shooting off down the slope without a backward glance.
‘I’m fine!’ I shouted after her.
‘Don’t worry, I’ll help you,’ Xavier said, already stood up and wiggling along like one of Andy’s soldiers inToy Story.
‘I don’t want to hold you up, honestly, you go on with Liv,’ I said, staring down the run ahead of me and once again asking myself how the fuckety-fucking-fuck I’d managed to get myself into this situation.
‘I’m not going anywhere. First rule of the slopes: know where your friends are. Second rule: don’t worry about the people behind you; worry about the people in front of you. Third rule: don’t be tempted to bin bag down the mountain if you can’t find your board.’
‘Ahhh, thank you, Sensei. Wise words indeed. I certainly won’t be climbing inside a bin bag to shuttle down the mountain, I can assure you. I value my bones.’
Xavier manoeuvred himself out in front of me and took my hands to help me stand. I had very nearly almost got the standing up part of this sorted, so progress was definitely being made. My knees wobbled as I felt the snow under my board, and I tried to ground myself by pushing into the soles of my feet like the pros repeatedly say to do on YouTube. Xavier was standing perfectly still, steady as a rock, like it was no trouble at all. Between his helmet, his snood, his goggles and his liquorice-black outfit, there were just two slivers of Xavier on show: two tiny stripes of skin on his cheeks. I couldn’t see his eyes, but no doubt they were staring at me intently.
‘OK?’ he asked with a questioning nod.
Absolutely not. I was so not OK.
‘Yep,’ I said, nodding back.
Xavier let go of my hands and shuffled backwards, staying in front to protect me as I made my way down.If I made my way down.I sort of knew what to do but I didn’t want to do it. Would this ever be fun? I tipped myself slightly over the edge, digging my heels in with all my strength. I heel-slid forward and to my delight, started to slowly scrape down the mountain. Very slowly, but it was happening. Xavier gave me a thumbs up and spun round to board alongside me and do the exact same thing. Yessss, I was doing ittttt. Was I doing it?
‘Is this it?’ I shouted to Xavier.
‘Yes,’ he shouted back, ‘it’s called falling leaf, but you won’t be able to stay on your heels for too long; your knees won’t like it.’
‘What do I do next then?’ I shouted, while sliding at a snail’s pace down the piste, my whole body clenched in fear.
Xavier smoothly swivelled on his board to face me, spraying snow on an innocent skier as he turned. Show off. He must have the thigh muscles of a prizewinning ox.
‘Switch onto your toes,’ he said, holding both arms in the air and spinning around. Easier said than done. I sat down with a thump as my legs gave way and swung my snowboard around to face the mountain. Then continued my embarrassingly slow descent but this time on my toes.
‘Looking good, Holly,’ Liv shouted, as she flew past for the third time. Xavier was slowly carving alongside me and gave a double thumbs up. I was glad my most uncool life moment to date was being so closely witnessed. I slowly chipped past a family of four eating sandwiches on the side of the piste and eventually made it to the bottom of the slope where Liv was vaping and scrolling through her phone.
‘Verrry nice babes,’ she said, in a cloud of bubblegum. ‘Tightly controlled.’
‘You’re doing great, Holly,’ Xavier said. ‘Think how far you’ve come in a week. You are doing falling leaf down the mountain on heels and toes. Next step is joining them together and then it is just practice.’
‘I’ll never look as good as you two,’ I said, disheartened. I looked up at the slopes as people swooshed down on all sides, skidding to a halt for a quick beer before carrying on. I was cold, wet, and miserable. The snow was not my thing.
‘Coming back up?’ Liv asked.
‘You two go on; I think I’m going to have a break,’ I said, pulling off my gloves and my wrist-guards and unbuckling my helmet.
They didn’t need telling twice, running off towards the lift to get a few runs in together.
‘I’ll save you a seat,’ I shouted after them. Honestly, how was I ever going to work this out? Maybe I needed a few days on my own, practicing sliding about.
The restaurant at the bottom of the piste was bustling with activity. A beautiful wooden chalet, with rows and rows of trestle tables, stuffed with smiling people eating sandwiches and fries and drinking tiny beers. There was a circular ski-up bar serving cheese and ham toasts for those on the go and a sunbathing section where the less-active holidaymakers snoozed in deckchairs. I trudged into the main restaurant on the hunt for a Mars Bar and the place was teeming with people balancing trays of various foods and confidently walking in different directions. There didn’t seem to be a queue, or system of any kind and I wasn’t sure how to navigate the chaos, so I followed a ski instructor who seemed to know what he was doing and copied his every move. I was standing behind him in the queue, waiting to pay for my glühwein and apple strudel when I felt someone tweak my pigtails.
