Page 91 of For Keeps. For Always.

They didn’t want me.

They wanted the guy who employed me.

I was confident enough in myself that if I wanted my dick wet, I could manage it on my own.

It’s just that no one tempted me to the point I felt the need to put in the effort.

Or more, maybe my heart is now so scarred, it’s numb from all emotion, including lust.

I’d be lying if I said that was true.

I still jerk my dick often enough to know I’m not numb to desire.

I see her on the back of my eyelids, pressed up against the elevator wall. I can almost feel her—if I concentrate hard enough—squeezing my cock so tight it jerks with want.

Dragging a hand roughly down my face, I inhale heavily.

Sowing my wild oats.

Fuck it. She’s right.

My mother thinks I should be out fucking around, and she’s fucking right.

Grabbing my phone, I download some app the guys were raving about on the tour bus. Some whacked-out technology that collatesmatchesin your area to message in the hope you’ll score a quick and easy fuck.

I set up a basic profile, taking a lackluster selfie to include.

I scan through potential matches, nothing stirring even the slightest temptation.

I don’t know what I’m looking for.

I know what I’mnotlooking for.

I don’t need to admit that I swipe left on women who don’t lookenoughlike Henley.

I swipe left on women who looktoomuch like her.

I’m narrowing my options down to a convenient zero percent of the population. Self-sabotaging like a rock star.

And then her face is there.

Her long dark hair.

Her perfectly imperfect scatter of freckles.

Her sad eyes.

On this ridiculous app.

In my area.

Fuck.

I turn the screen away, certain I’m seeing shit that isn’t there.

Turning it back, I pinch my nose.

Henleyit reads.

Source: www.allfreenovel.com