Page 34 of Before I'm Gone


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“Because I feel drawn to you, Palmer. Because I came across the list, and there’s something about it that makes me want to make sure you accomplish everything on there, and then some.”

“I’m dying, Kent. No one wants to spend their time with someone they don’t know, let alone someone who’s dying. The things my body will go through . . . no one wants to watch that. There are going to be days—” Palmer couldn’t finish her sentence. She didn’t need to. Kent already knew what she was going to go through. The more her tumor grew, the closer she’d come to death.

He shrugged. “I do,” he said. “And who better than a paramedic? I can take care of you and make sure you’re getting your meds.” Kent rubbed his hands over his legs. “Besides.” He looked at her and tried to smile. “You’d be helping me.”

“How?”

“I’ll be honest, Palmer. There’s some stuff going on in my life that could mess with my head. Getting out of town would be a relief. And like I said, I’m drawn to you. I can’t explain it, but there’s something in here”—he pressed his hand to his heart—“that says this is something I need to do.”

Kent cleared his throat. “I’ve seen death. I’ve held soldiers while they died. Most of them just looked at me, and when I saw your list, I wondered if they had one. I’ve lost people in the field or in the back of the rig. What would they have done if given one more day? Just thinking about traveling with you is exciting. I’ve already planned multiple trips based on your list. I know you’re sick, and some days will not be good, but I want to give you as many tomorrows as possible.”

Palmer stood and picked up Kent’s water glass. She took it into the kitchen and refilled it. Kent waited. He felt as if he had made his case. He wanted her to say yes. Kent wanted to travel and give her the best last days possible while being out of town on his days off. Maeve knew his schedule, and if he didn’t have to see her right now, it would be for the best.

“Thanks,” Kent said when Palmer returned with a full glass of water. She went to the large window overlooking the road, with the view of the mountains, and stared. Kent joined her. He could see his car from the window but couldn’t tell if he had a ticket or not. He was sure he’d been in Palmer’s apartment for longer than thirty minutes.

“It’s a lot to think about,” he said. “You have a lot going on, but you have nothing to lose, right? And I’m guessing you have vacation time?”

“I quit my job.”

“Really?”

Palmer nodded. “It’s easier this way.”

“How long did they give you?” Kent didn’t need to expand on his question. Palmer’s expression told him she knew what he meant.

“Six months.”

He didn’t have six months of time . . . unless. Kent needed to see his deputy chief. “What do you think?”

Palmer gazed at Kent and smiled softly. She was a beautiful woman with eyes that still had a sparkle in them. “I think it’s a very generous offer, but I can’t ask you to give up your life for me. You hardly know me, and the things you’d potentially see . . .” She sighed. “I know what’s coming and am afraid of what they’re going to do to me.”

“Palmer, I want to do this. For you. For me. For us. For an adventure of a lifetime. Can you at least think about it for a couple of days? I’m working tomorrow, and then I’m off. Can I stop by?”

She nodded.

Kent did something so out of character he shocked himself. He pulled Palmer into a hug and held her. “Call me if you need me. If I’m working, call dispatch. I’ll always respond.” It was a promise he didn’t know he could keep, but he’d try.

He made sure Palmer had everything she needed before he left. When he got down to his car, he looked toward her window and swore he saw her wave.

TWELVE

She waved, but was it enough?

Even before Kent left her apartment, Palmer was second-guessing herself. He’d done something no one had ever done for her before—he’d offered to take her on a trip. Not just any trip, but one designed to fulfill the items on her list. She couldn’t believe she’d shut him down without giving his proposal much thought. This was her automatic reaction to everything. She’d learned how to be independent, how to not rely on anyone but herself. Needless to say, Kent’s kind gesture had shocked her.

As soon as he left her apartment, she realized her mistake. Even though he’d told her to call him if she changed her mind, she wasn’t sure she would. She stood at her window and was certain it was Kent she waved to. He was motionless, at least to her. The person she watched opened their car door and then shut it without getting inside. They turned and waved.

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