Page 68 of Before I'm Gone


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“What do you mean?”

Kent turned, brought his leg up to rest on the bench, and placed his ankle on his knee. Palmer did the same, matching his pose. “I’m not trying to hide this part of my life. You told your coworkers you moved, and they may or may not see this. I see the comments and how people are behind us, encouraging us, and it makes me happy. We’re doing something good, something others can get behind. But we’re doing it for a reason. If you hadn’t been diagnosed with a tumor, we’d be at work right now. You’d be processing loans, and I’d be sitting next to Damian in the rig, waiting for a call.” Kent sighed. “I don’t know. I think if you’re willing to share, people will listen, but you have to accept that your coworkers back home might see this, and they might be hurt.”

“I’m not sure anything you just said makes sense,” she said sarcastically.

Kent laughed loudly. “You’re right. Bottom line, if you want to go live or start posting your face on the app, we can. If not, no biggie.”

“My story could help, though, right? Like, if I tell people I’ve had these migraines and encourage them to seek image testing, I could save a life.”

“You absolutely could. You could also show people that life is short, and if there’s something you want to do, you get out there and do it.”

“Manifest your happiness.”

“Exactly,” Kent said. He smiled and loved how amazing Palmer was.

“Let’s do it.”

“Okay, when?”

“Right now,” she said enthusiastically.

Kent picked his phone up off the bench and moved closer to Palmer. He took the steps to go live and waited. After a few seconds, people started watching. At first, there were ten viewers, then twenty, and then over a hundred.

“Hey, everyone,” he started, and then positioned the camera to include Palmer in the frame. “I’m Kent, and this is Palmer.” She waved and then giggled. “We want to start off by saying thank you for all the love and support you’ve given us. We are in awe, and you’ve made us feel very special.” Kent paused for a minute and showed Palmer the comments that flowed in. “We’re going to answer a couple of these questions for you.” He elbowed Palmer and asked, “Do you want to read their name and their question?”

“Sure.” She leaned forward and squinted. Kent knew instantly she’d have trouble seeing the scrolling, faint script and regretted asking her if she wanted to read the comments.

“Someone wants to know who your favorite musician is,” Kent said to Palmer.

“Oh, that’s easy—Lana Del Rey.” Palmer squeezed Kent’s hand to thank him.

“Excellent choice. We’re going to have to listen to her when we head to our next location.” He beamed at Palmer. “Okay, they want to know why we’re taking this trip.” He glanced at Palmer and cocked his eyebrow.

She inhaled and stared at her reflection on Kent’s phone. “I have . . .” She paused and shook her head. “I guess if you’re following us, you already know. I’m not well . . .” She trailed off. Her eyes found Kent, and he took over, answering a handful of questions while she sat next to him. He read each one to Palmer, who added commentary every now and again. They finished and promised to go live again in a few days.

“What happened?” Kent asked her after he closed the app.

Palmer shrugged. “I just . . .” She shook her head. “I guess I never really said it out loud, except to you, and I don’t even remember if I said it to you.” She wiped at her tears. “The thought of saying it made my heart hurt.” Palmer sobbed and covered her face.

Kent brought her into his arms and held her. The magnitude of the moment washed over him, and he cried with her. Admitting that you were dying was a hard thing to do, but to tell strangers—that was overwhelming.

People walked by and stared. Some stopped and asked if they were okay. Kent nodded and thanked them. He kept Palmer’s face buried, to protect her dignity from onlookers. He held her to his chest and let her cry until her tears ran dry. They had nowhere to go and nowhere to be unless they wanted. That was the beauty of their situation. No one depended on them for anything. They only needed each other.

A dark cloud covered the bright sun, and rain fell. Kent tapped Palmer’s shoulder and told her they needed to head back to the hotel. She sat up and tilted her head back. Kent sat there, watching as raindrops dotted her face. An idea struck.

Kent turned on his music app and looked at his recently played songs. Palmer was the last one to listen to music, while she bathed in the tub. He pressed the first song and then reached for her hand.

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