Page 97 of Before I'm Gone


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“Thank you.” Palmer blushed and ran her hands down the front of her dress. She grabbed a sweater, and Kent helped her put it on. “Shall we go to dinner?”

Kent held her chair in place, and she looked from it to Kent. He motioned for her to sit, but she hesitated. Palmer frowned. “Just until we get to the car,” he said. “You can hold my arm into the restaurant.”

Palmer sat down and tucked her dress under her legs, away from the wheels. Kent pushed her down the hall. He made car noises and tipped the chair back so it popped a wheelie. He laughed while Palmer squealed and told him to knock it off. Kent only stopped when they entered the lobby. He didn’t want people staring at her because of his actions, but because of how pretty she was.

Luckily the restaurant wasn’t busy, and they were able to get a table rather quickly. Palmer shocked Kent when she ordered a cocktail. He couldn’t believe his ears. Palmer had led a very straitlaced type of life, even when facing death’s door. He liked the idea of her letting loose.

“Are you going to order something to drink?” she asked after the waiter had left with their order.

“I did.”

“No, I mean a beer or a cocktail.” Palmer leaned forward. Her eyes beamed with happiness. “You should get something.”

“I’m good,” he told her. He wouldn’t indulge in an alcoholic beverage while her care depended on him. That would be reckless, and he’d never forgive himself if something were to happen and he couldn’t take care of her. “Besides, I’m high on life.” He tapped her knee under the table and grinned.

“High on life because you’re having a little girl?”

Kent’s face fell. He wasn’t excited about becoming a father, especially a single dad.

“What’s wrong?” Palmer asked.

Kent tried to shake off his disappointment, but to no avail. “Whenever I imagined being a parent, it wasn’t like this. I feel duped and trapped,” he said. “I was put into a situation without my knowledge, and now an innocent baby will end up paying the price. Can you imagine how confusing this is going to be for her when she’s older?”

“I imagine it will be the same as if you and Maeve had been together and split when Baby Girl Wagner was two or three. Honestly, this isn’t much different from parents divorcing when they have really young children and one of them is moving on. You gotta look at it differently.”

“How?” he asked.

“As a blessing. You created a life, and that little girl is going to grow up with the best daddy out there. If you’re half the man with her that you are with me, she’s going to know you’re always in her corner being her champion. That’s something I wish I had—someone there at the end of the day to just ask me how my day was and mean it, to sincerely want to know. The people at the group home, they’d ask, but it was their job. They didn’t care about the bullying or anything else that went on. They never checked homework or reprimanded the children because of a bad grade. You’re going to do all of that and more for your daughter, and over time, you’ll forget about the situation that brought her into your life and remember the first time you held her in your arms. I hear that’s when people experience true love for the first time.”

“I hadn’t looked at things that way.”

“No, you probably saw the burden, both financially and physically. Right?”

Kent nodded and felt horrible for doing so. The child shouldn’t be looked at as a burden; she didn’t ask for this. “I know I can support her. That isn’t the issue. I just don’t know what kind of dad I want to be, or if they’ll allow me to be a dad at all. Her husband may not be on board with me being in the baby’s life.”

“He doesn’t have a choice,” Palmer said. “The DNA test will always prove she’s yours. He has no say if you get to be in her life or not. If he thinks he does, you take him to court, and you fight for her.”

Easier said than done. “Yeah.” Kent sighed and wished he had a beer or five to numb the voices in his head. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to talk about this with Palmer; it was that he wanted Palmer with him when the baby was born. He wanted her by his side moving forward. Kent’s needs were irrational, and he knew it. He’d just have to bring himself to think otherwise.

Their drinks came, soda for him and a tequila sunrise for her. She offered him a sip, and he took it. The quick taste wouldn’t impair him. “Oh, wow, that’s tasty,” he said. Palmer sipped. She pulled the straw away, and her face contorted as the liquor hit her taste buds.

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