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I told myself that all evening, tried to get thoughts of him out of my head while I cooked dinner, then while I sat down at the coffee table to eat it. The whole time my gaze kept getting drawn to where I was supposed to sign to confirm Riven was at work and did what he was supposed to be doing.
By nine o’clock I was rummaging around for a goddamned pen so I could sign the sheet, take it to his place, and get Riven McKenna off my mind. If not, I’d drive myself crazy stressing about it because that was the kind of guy I was.
After taping it together, folding it up, and stuffing it into an envelope, I tugged on a pair of sneakers and headed out to the truck.
I used to go with my brother, when Rex and Riven needed help with whatever they were up to, needed me to keep guard, help them transport stolen shit or even sell it for them. Those were the few times Rex would let me tag along.
Fuck, I still hated myself for some of the things I’d done back then, and I did my best to make amends for it now. Especially when it came to Betsy. I shouldn’t have stayed quiet while they’d done illegal shit on her property. Did Riven know about that, I wondered? Me coming to his grandma’s when he was locked up?
I parked down the street from Riven’s place. While they didn’t live as far out as Rex or Dad, they lived down a driveway with only two houses, quite a bit of space between them.
I’d be lucky if I didn’t get my ass shot, creeping down their gravel driveway like this after dark, but I thought that was a better alternative than risking Riven seeing me.
The lights in the house were off, but the ones in Riven’s garage were on and muted behind the blinds. I tried the door on his truck, which was unlocked the way I figured it would be. I set the envelope on the seat, and just as I was quietly closing the door behind me, I noticed the red glow of the end of a cigarette from the porch.
“What are you doing here, Parrish?” he grumbled through the dark in that almost scratchy voice.
“Jesus, you could have said something earlier.”
“But where’s the fun in that? I’d much rather watch you try to sneak around like you’re smooth.”
He was such a dick, but the truth was, I couldn’t say I wouldn’t have done the same in his situation. What I asked, though, was, “You smoke?” because he hadn’t before he’d been locked up—not cigarettes, at least.
“Nope.”
“I don’t know why you have to be an asshole. You’re just like him. How long until you’re up to your old shit with him?” For a reason I couldn’t understand, I found myself walking toward Riven rather than away from him.
“Fuck your brother,” he spit out, his voice seething in a way I’d never heard. That was…really interesting. “Fuck your dad. Fuck your whole family.”
“Do you know many words other than fuck?”
“Fu—get the hell out of here, Hunt. I don’t have time for this shit.”
I stopped in front of him, Riven looking up at me from where he sat on the single porch stair. He wasn’t wearing his cap, his dark hair messy like he’d spent the evening running his fingers through it…or had someone else’s fingers running through it.
That definitely wasn’t where my thoughts needed to go.
“Real busy, are you?” I asked.
He stubbed out his cigarette in the ashtray. “Why are you here?”
Good question. There was no reason to be, but something about Riven got me all tangled up. It always had, and clearly, it always would. “Because you’re a hothead and took off without your signed form. Jesus, when will you guys learn that biting off your nose to spite your face isn’t going to get you anywhere? Rex does the same shit. Control your temper.”
He shoved to his feet. “Who the hell are you to tell me what to do and to pretend you know me? You don’t know shit about me. All you are is a grown-up version of that kid who was always smarter than the rest of us and who never should have gotten his ass trapped in this place, but instead you cared too much about fitting in with your dad and your brother to do shit.”
Rage surged through me, an electric current I couldn’t control. I shoved him, making Riven stumble backward and almost trip over the porch. “Fuck you.” My heart raced, blood boiling inside me, filling me with anger at him…and myself. I didn’t do shit like this. I didn’t push people. I didn’t lose my temper the way they did.
“Do you know many words other than fuck?” he tossed back at me.
