Page 223 of The Harmless Series


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“Can you start right now?”

Silence.

“Now?” Her voice is girly. “Right now?”

“Right now. I can be there in five minutes.”

“You want to start shooting now?”

Yes. But not the way she thinks.

“Sure. But Tiffany, this is a complicated show. I really need your help. Don’t say a word to anyone.”

“Not even my agent?”

“Not until tomorrow. No.”

“Okay,” she says slowly. “What’s this reality show about, anyway?”

“It’s about people who spy on their neighbors.”

“Ooooo!”

Silas rolls his eyes again.

“So we’ll be filming constantly,” I explain, ignoring him. “Starting now. And you’ll help smuggle me into your apartment.”

“Smuggle?”

“Yeah, like someone who spies would do it.”

“Oh, right. We need to make this look very professional.”

“Exactly. I knew you were the perfect woman for this,” I answer, shining her on.

She makes an airy sound of glee.

“So what do I do?”

“A guy in a repair van is going to drive down the road in a minute. As soon as you see the van, open your garage. He’ll drive in, and you’ll shut the garage.”

She’s silent for a few beats. “That’s it?”

“To start.”

“I have dialogue, right? This isn’t some cheesy walk-on extra part.”

“Oh, no,” I reply. “You’re the lead actress.”

“The lead?” she gasps. “This is too good to be true!”

“Tell me about it,” Silas mutters.

“What do I do again?”

“You open the garage door when you see the van. We pull in. Close the garage door.” I grit my teeth. Hopefully I haven’t overestimated her ability to retain basic instructions.

“And cameras will be rolling?”

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