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But of course, dreams like that require sacrifice and commitment, and I was already indentured to Canyon Spring Ranch. I’d foolishly believed I could have both. Thought Pa might be proud I’d made something of myself, on my own. But I was wrong.
Dreams like that—dreams that grow beyond the family, beyond Canyon Spring—were never an option.
This place reminds me of all the things in life I could’ve had if I weren’t Devlin and Sage Kincaide’s son.
“Nah. I’m not looking to rehash the glory days.” I prop my booted foot on the dugout wall in front of us. “Just needed a quiet place to talk. The team has an away game today. I knew there’d be no one here.”
“Must be important if you’re pulling me away from work onyourranch. What’s going on?” His tone is casual, but I feel the concern lacing his words.
Like always, Mack senses when I’m troubled, and he’s going to open his big teddy bear heart and do whatever he can to help me fix it. The man may be a solid wall of muscle on the outside, but on the inside he’s just a big ol’ roll of dough. We’re such opposites, it’s a wonder he ever became my friend, let alone the closest person in my life.
We got into a lot of shit together in the past—alcohol, teenage pranks, and girls were usually involved. But it was always my idea. I’d be the one dragging him down into trouble. Mack was always the one to pull us out.
Sure, I was the one who convinced Pa to hire him on as a hand after his parents lost their ranch, but that just gave me an excuse to boss him around and tease him about it after.
If he wasn’t one of the nicest guys on the planet, he’d have probably told me to go to hell a long time ago. Or kicked my ass for being such an obnoxious prick.
Right now, I’m grateful he’s not an asshole like me. “I don’t even know where to start,” I tell him.
“Start at the beginning. Just lay it out as it’s in your head.”
I let out a frustrated sigh, running my fingers through my close-cropped hair. “That’s the problem. My head’s all over the goddamn place. I just know I fucked up and I don’t know what to do about it. I hate feeling like things are out of my control.”
“You make it sound like that’s something new.” His mouth tips up to a teasing grin.
“Shut up, asshole. I’m serious.”
“Sorry,” he says through a light chuckle. “Just trying to lighten the mood. Is it about the ranch? You having second thoughts about Chastity?”
Hell, I’ve barely thought of the ranch or my fiancée in the past three days.
After talking to Lacy, I’d gone back to the party, shell-shocked and disheveled, to find Chastity deep in conversation with Mama. It was easy to ignore her since she’d stopped riding my ass about my behavior. She was still starstruck, with dollar signs in her eyes and wedding plans filling her head.
I took her home in near silence that night and haven’t seen or spoken to her since.
As for the ranch—well, the day-to-day practically runs itself, thanks to Mack and the people we have working for us. They don’t need me watching over their shoulders all the time.
“I got someone pregnant,” I blurt, but feel no better for having it out in the open. Instead, the words hang in the air like a heavy cloud, casting a dark shadow over this gorgeous day.
Mack sputters, “How?”
Is he laughing at me or choking on my admission? Not sure I care, but I’m about ready to hand him his ass if he can’t pull himself together.
“How in the hell do you think? I know you’ve been hard up since Rayna dumped you, but you do remember how sex works, right? It’s biology one-oh-fucking-one.”
“Real nice.” He stands, kicking a rock at his feet, and turns to me with a scowl. “Bring my ex into it. Remind me of the most painful time of my life. That’ll make you feel better, I’m sure.”
“Shit, man.” I stand beside him, still looking out to the field so I don’t have to look him in the eye.Goddamn, I really am an asshole. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have gone there. It’s not an excuse, but I’m really messed up about this whole thing.”
“Well, no kidding.” His voice is gruff but forgiving. Only Mack would let me get away with trashing him about the woman who broke his heart, and then stick around to hear my woes.
“But my question stands,” he continues. “How’d it happen? Last I looked you weren’t in a relationship—and no, your fake-ass arrangement with Chastity does not count. I’m pretty sure you haven’t touched her.”
“Damn straight.” We share a look. He knows Chastity won’t let me in her bed before the wedding, and I wouldn’t want to go there, regardless.
But God, how sad is that? The thought of sex with my fiancée is so unappealing even my friend knows I haven’t fucked her.
Finally, I turn toward him, leaning my hip against the dugout wall, shaking my head in bewilderment. “I don’t know how it happened. I mean, I’m not a complete idiot, we used protection. It was just one night. I never expected it to turn into trouble like this.”
