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She doesn’t have to look at me. We don’t need words. Never did. I know. I slowly place our hands together, locking them in a gentle hold. Perfect fit, as always.
“Lacey, I know you don’t want to hear it, but I need to say it. It’s a cosmic joke that our sons would end up as the best of friends. It’s almost fucking cruel. However cruel, I’m glad it happened. I thought I would never see you again. From the moment I walked out your door, I regretted leaving you. I’ve never forgotten that day. Never. It’s cataloged in my mind. I left both of you.” My eyes look over to where Jackson and Jacob are playing. The stab of regret and pain resides deep within me.
“This is not necessary, Landon,” she says, but is still holding on to my hand.
“It is to me.” I bring her closer, slowly, making sure I can feel if there’s any tension in her body. I need to know if my touch—that is almost too intimate, given our history—is okay with her. I want her to know if she needs to move away she can, without fearing my reaction. “Look at me, Lacey. I won’t hurt you. I would never.” She looks at me, the muscles in her delicate throat working up and down. I wait for a beat of time to pass before I continue. She’s still got remnants of the gentle, almost shy, girl I fell in love with a lifetime ago.
With no thought, just a natural reflex, I stroke my other hand across her cheek, and she responds in the way only she could to me. She raises her head, and it’s not just a look we share. We click. Her lips part slightly with an exhale of breath. I’m enchanted with the warmth of her skin under my rough fingertip, her soft skin, and our bodies so close.
The crash of a garbage can breaks the spell. We jerk apart. She backs up five steps, eyes wide, hand on her chest.
Damn.
“Mom, we’re okay. Jackson hit the can. It was an accident.”
“It’s all right. As long as you’re both fine,” she calls back to him.
Jackson is looking at me. I give him a smile, but he doesn’t react. He turns around and fixes the can back in place. Hmm, wonder what that’s about. I’ll ask him later. I need to deal with Lacey before she dashes out of here. “Lace—”
A smile tugs at the corner of her mouth. “You called me that when you wanted me to pay attention to you.”
Funny how I never noticed. I continue. “Our sons are attached at the hips. We are going to be in each other’s lives, whether we want to or not. I need to know is, am I making you uncomfortable? I don’t want to do that.”
“You’re not. It really threw me when we ran into each other at the school. It was a head-on collision, seeing you standing there with a son the same age as Jacob. Can we do this for them?”
“I think we can, for them. I think it would be good for them, this friendship they’ve found. I think Jackson needs a friend like Jacob in his life now. He’s the only real friend I’ve seen him this interested in making.”
“Same with Jacob. He hasn’t had an easy time of making friends. The transition from home to school last year wasn’t good. I was so happy when he came home talking nonstop about his new friend. You don’t know how happy I am he’s found someone, so he doesn’t feel like he’s all alone. I know how that feels.”
“No one should feel that way. Especially not a kid,” I agree.
“It sucks. Especially when it’s your kid, and you’re helpless to do anything about it.” She turns and looks out at them once more. She smiles and laughs at something they’re doing. I hear the boys laughing, too. Just standing here, I can see how much she loves Jacob. I can tell even more when the smile doesn’t leave when she looks at me and says, “The day after tomorrow good for you? I’m off on Saturdays until my mom comes back.”
“It’s great. Around one?”
“See you then.”
She walks to the back yard, scooping up the rabbit and dropping him into the cage, and calls Jacob over to leave. He jumps off the jungle gym I set up for Jackson so he wouldn’t be bored or cooped up inside my office when he’s here with me. There is a separate little playroom I made for him, too. Hey, kids need choices. Couldn’t have him running around in a bar. That’s a problem waiting to happen.
They come back in, and I turn at the sound of my name being called.
“Landon, got a sec? Who signed off on the last shipment?” Trigg walks in as he always does, without knocking, looking at the paper in his hand, and stops mid-step when he notices I’m not alone.
“Hey, Trigg,” Lacey says, smiling. I’m kind of jealous at how easily she did that for him. “It’s been a long time.”
“The longest. Lacey McQueen. It’s freaking good to see you.” He smiles, brushing back his signature long, blond hair. True Trigg style, he drops the papers on my desk and pulls her in for a hug, lifting her off her feet before putting her down. “How the hell have you been, girl?”
She giggles. “Good to see you haven’t changed much. Still warm and welcoming.”
“Why would I ever change perfection?”
She looks at me, and I shake my head. She’s right; he hasn’t changed much. That’s both good and bad. The changes he has made though are all for the better. There used to be a time when all he did was sex, get high, party, drink, repeat. All in that order. A different girl every week. Except when he met Shay. For some reason, she was different. For a while, she was the one who kept bouncing back, like a rubber ball against a brick wall. Until that one time, and it hit him hard in the chest.
“Trigg, this is my pride and joy.” She places her hand on Jacob’s shoulder. “My son, Jacob.”
Without missing a beat, he holds out his hand to him. “It’s nice to meet you, Jacob. I’m Trigg, an old friend of your mother’s.”
“Hi, Trigg. You’re tall. Like a tree.” He cranes his head up at him.
