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I push a piece of hair behind my ear, trying to smile at the girl. It wouldn’t make sense to scowl at her, even though that’s what I want to do.
“Do you want to sit with me and my friends?” Aubrey motions toward the cafeteria doors. “We’re alldyingto talk to you.”
She blinks expectedly at me.
And maybe this girl is pretty enough to get the attention of the nefarious three. Maybe they’ll finally notice me if I become friends with Henley. Imagine if Blaine finally asked me out.
“Uh, actually I want to sit by myself. Today is overwhelming and I need time to process.” I worry my bottom lip between my teeth, praying that the girl takes my rejection nicely.
The girl drops her smile, but only for a split second.What a freak. The smile quickly snaps back into place.
She shrugs. “Whatever.”
The blonde girl walks into the cafeteria, leaving me there alone.
It’s not too late to bail—I can just eat when I get home from school. It’s only three more hours.
My stomach growls again.
No. I can’t be a coward. I can do this. I can’t just skip lunch every day. I have to go in there and face it at some point.
Holding my head high, I walk through the double doors that lead into the cafeteria. The lunchroom is already packed. As soon as I open the doors, every single head turns toward me. The room is relatively quiet, but there is a roar in my head—so many thoughts that I can’t process any of them.
I turn and walk out of the cafeteria as fast as my shaky legs will take me. I’m stumbling over my own feet and so dizzy that the walls are moving. Somehow, I make it out the door, the noise subsiding as the door shuts behind me. I start to head toward where I think the bathroom is, but I know I can’t make it in time. There is a large trashcan in the hallway and I lean my head over, throwing up what little I had in my stomach.
It’s quiet in the hallway, so I know nobody is around. I’m thankful. I need a minute to myself.
This is too much. Public school sucks worse than I ever imagined.
I keep my head over the trashcan for a few seconds after I stop being sick. I don’t look up until I see a pair of red tennis shoes at the edge of my vision. I slowly lift my head up, trying to prepare myself for another person’s thoughts to invade my brain, but there isnothing. No thoughts. No feelings. Just blissful silence.
I look into a pair of bright blue eyes and my breath catches in my throat. I want to open my mouth and say something—anything. But instead, I stumble backward. I know I’m about to land hard on the concrete floor when he reaches a hand out and grabs onto my arm. His strength alone is what keeps me from falling.
The moment his skin touches mine, I have a calm in my mind like I’ve never experienced before. The dizziness and headache are gone, I’m no longer feeling sick to my stomach, and it’s just so quiet.
So, so quiet.
The boy studies me, his eyebrows furrowed. “Are you all right?”
I clear my throat. “Yeah. I’m good.”
“Are you sure?” he asks. “You were just puking into a trashcan.”
I cringe. It’s not exactly the first impression I wanted to make. I look into his blue eyes, trying to read something, but there is nothing. Just like with that boy earlier.
Before today, the only person I couldn’t read was my father. There has to be something to this.
He waves a hand in front of my face. “Are you sure you’re okay?”
I nod, my cheeks growing warm. “I’m new. I just moved here. It’s my first day, so I’m feeling kind of overwhelmed. You know. Because it’s my first day. I’m… new.”
Did I seriously just say the same thing twice? This boy is going to think there is something wrong with me. Then again, maybe there is.
He cocks his head to the side. “What are you?”
What?
He said what.
