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“What’s the problem, man?”
“What do you mean ‘What’s the problem?’”
“You got upset about your wife and broke down?”
“That’s what I said.”
“Help me out here—I’m missing something.”
I scratch my head, irritated. “What else is there to understand? I broke down crying in front of Noah. It’s humiliating.”
“Did she like . . . make fun of you?” He pulls his cap off and runs a hand across his barely-there hair.
“What? No! No.”
“You’re just telling me you’re embarrassed?”
“Yeah—I was hoping for a little sympathy or something, but not sure that’s in the cards for me today.”
Paul balls up his paper napkin and tosses it at my face. It hits me square in the forehead.
“What was that for?”
“You’re being too sensitive. What did Noah say about that night?”
“Nothing. We haven’t talked about it.”
“I’m not seeing the problem. You had an emotional moment, and Noah gave you the space to do so. It seems like what a good friend would do.”
“I know, but I think I freaked her out. Who expects to witness a man crumbling onto the floor of their spare bedroom? That’s not normal.”
Paul gives me an odd look before emphatically stating, “I don’t think there’s anythingnormalabout either of your situations. Your wife died and left you a single dad. You’re broke. You’ve moved in with Noah, a single mom-ish person, to be her roommate and the caregiver for her niece.”
I stare at him because he’s fucking right and I hate it. How is he always right about things?
“Do you think Noah’s someone who freaks out when a man cries?”
“Probably not,” I admit.
Everything Noah’s shown me to be true about herself presents a woman who’s honest with those around her, not afraid to call others on their bullshit—except maybe her brother—and unapologetically herself from her dirty little one-liners to the quirks I’m becoming acquainted with as her roommate.
“Then, while I can appreciate your embarrassment, you need to let Noah tell you how she feels about what happened instead of deciding for her.”
I chew on the inside of my cheek.Thisis why I appreciate Paul’s friendship, even if it borders on overbearing. He lays out what he’s got to say and leaves it to me to decide what to do with it. His words are always wiser than any I can offer my situation.
“I’ve known Noah for a few years now. Not personally, but you know with my job and her brother—you said she told you about her brother being in jail, right? She’s had a really rough go of it with him—she’s got to be tough and a fighter. A man’s tears won’t scare her away. You’ll have to try harder than that.”
“Try harder?”
“I see the way you light up when I say her name. You can’t get anything past me. You know I did my time as a detective before becoming the big shot I am now, right?”
“Yeah, yeah . . . It’s nothing like that,” I fib.
Paul tosses another balled up napkin at my face. “Say whatever you want out loud, but your face is doing the real talking my friend.” I take back everything I’ve thought about Paul’s wisdom—this man is a telepath and can see right through me to my secrets and insecurities.
From the moment I caught sight of Noah kneeling in the toy aisle in Walmart, I knew she was beautiful. Hell, from head-to-toe I can describe in obnoxious detail all the things I like about her: her shiny, dark, long hair, how her eyes reveal her feelings without her saying a word, her smooth pale skin that must feel like silk—and the fact she never bothers covering it in makeup—the way her curves sometimes peek out from under her shirt or over her jeans, the smell of floral muskiness floating around her, and the fact she wears ridiculous high heels to work, but kicks them off immediately when she gets home. Those are just the external qualities.
She’s blown me away with her authenticity. Her dedication to Rainey is something I’ve never witnessed except between a parent and child. I know it’s rare, and every glimpse I’m given of the two of them together reaffirms my faith that good people still exist. Her ability to not just laugh at herself, but to wholeheartedly crack herself up to a point of being breathless, is unlike anyone I’ve ever known; she’s not the funniest girl I’ve ever met, but her unabashed love to laugh is a delight. Above all, Noah’s selfless. I see it in her relationship with Rainey. I see it in her allowing my daughter and me to move in. I see it in the way she talks about her brother, even after hearing how he treats her in return. I’m nowhere near ready contemplate anything further than cultivating a friendship with her, but I’m intrigued and impressed by everything I learn about her.
