AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“Marry you!?”
“I told you we were mates.”
“I know you did, but I didn’t take that literally. I thought it was just pillow talk.”
“Do pillows talk where you come from?”
My wife makes a noise of outrage.
“I need to go for a walk,” she says.
“No, we’re not doing that again.”
Ivy pinches the bridge of her nose. “Fine. Where can I go that is safe to take a walk? I need air, and I need some distance.”
We stand off for a time, while my heart breaks. I don’t understand why she is fighting this. I don’t understand what I did wrong.
“I said you were mine. You said you were jealous of me with anyone else. Everything was clear.”
Ivy shakes her head, and my heart is on the floor. “You said all those words, but I didn’t understand what I was getting into.”
I draw myself tall and say indignantly, “I speak perfectly plain English.”
Ivy’s chin trembles. “Maybe you don’t.”
While I’m trying to figure out what she means, the door suddenly flies open, and Eliyen, the village messenger, enters unannounced.
“I’m the middle of something!” I bark.
“Santa requests your presence,” Eliyen replies in her regal tone. “Which is why I didn’t knock.”
If Ivy was not already outraged, she is now. “Who are you?”
I make awkward introductions. “Eliyen, this is Ivy. Ivy, this is Eliyen, Santa’s snitch.”
Eliyen draws herself up to full height. “Are you coming with me or not? Nicholas is already annoyed that he has to deal with a hearing on Christmas Day, when he should be sleeping.”
“A hearing?”
“Don’t act like you don’t know what this is about. Come along.” She reaches for me, but Ivy, to my surprise, steps between us. “He’s not going anywhere.”
Eliyen sighs as if she’s being put upon, then turns to me. “Will it help the situation if the human accompanies you? He’s going to want to speak to her too.”
The three of us come to an agreement that Eliyen will transport us to the village in her sled, but first I insist on bundling up my wife in a spare fur coat and leather boots. And she won’t survive the descent without the special broth to keep her warm.
Fortunately for everyone involved, Ivy drinks from the thermos of broth and doesn’t shrink away from me as I hold her tightly next to me in the sled. For a human, this trip is a harrowing, speedy descent down a narrow, steep path with many twists and turns. My Ivy looks adorable, squeezing her eyes shut and clutching the broth.
“This is crazy,” I hear her mutter. “I’m going to freaking kick you in the gonads when we get to the bottom.”
“You may. But please spare me my ability to procreate.”
Ivy is still angry with me, but I adore her spirit even if I don’t understand.
Upon our arrival at the village square, I expect to see a crowd, ready to demand that I be brought up on charges of kidnapping. But then I remember it’s Christmas Day. Everyone is either sleeping or getting drunk with the mountain trolls.
I help Ivy exit the sled, holding her close to me as I set her dainty feet on the ground.
Eliyen gestures for us to follow her to the meeting cave.
