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“Nope. She didn’t want to have an abortion because of her religious beliefs. Going off to college with an infant didn’t fit too well with attending class and her plans to join a sorority. Her parents didn’t want to raise another kid when they had five and their youngest was in high school. So, she’d already picked a couple to adopt me after she gave birth.”
“Without telling him? Isn’t that illegal?” And unfair to not allow the baby’s father a say.
“Yup. My dad and his parents decided they wanted custody. At the time, I think my dad hoped they’d get back together. That didn’t happen. And caring for an infant screwed up his plans to enlist in the Army. We lived with my grandparents for a few years. My grandmother quit her job to help Dad out, but they hadn’t planned on raising another kid at that point in their lives either. I interfered with a lot of their plans.”
Sitting side-by-side while he drove, he didn’t have to look her in the face. Lack of eye contact often encouraged people to open up.
“You know none of that was your fault. It’s not like you had a choice about being conceived, whether you were born, and whether you were adopted or raised by your birth parents.”
He shrugged. “As for siblings, my dad married his first wife, Lynda, when I was in elementary school. They were married about three years. Her kids only lived with us half the time, and we haven’t kept in touch. Dad got married again a few years ago. Emily is great. I’ve spent some time with her and her two adult kids on holidays, but I don’t have a strong connection to them.”
He sighed and cut his gaze to her. “You don’t have a counseling file on me, right?”
“No. We’re just two friends talking.”
He nodded but didn’t speak right away. “My birth mom married a guy she met at college, and they had three kids. She’d given my dad sole custody, so I was never a part of her family. Just a past mistake. I only met those siblings a couple of times.”
“She may have considered getting pregnant a mistake, butyouaren’t a mistake.” She wasn’t his counselor, but she couldn’t help but give him her professional perspective.
“She and her folks definitely thought I was. When my dad was dating his first wife, Lynda, she wanted him to go to church with her. I was about eight at the time, and they dropped me off in a Sunday School class at this big church. They told the story of Jonah and the whale that day. I’d never heard it and wasn’t buying a guy being swallowed by a whale and living. When my dad and Lynda came to pick me up, the teacher lady tells Lynda how I was asking lots of questions and didn’t know any Bible stories. My dad stepped up and looked her in the eye, and I still remember him saying, ‘Well ma’am, I’d be happy to bring John by and you can spend a little time with your grandson and teach him Bible stories if that’s important to you.’”
“Oh, my.” What were the chances of him ending up in the Sunday School class taught by his grandparents?
“Yeah. She made some face, and she said real quietly, ‘don’t bring him back here.’ But my dad wouldn’t let it go. He got louder when he said, ‘What? You don’t want your church friends to know that your daughter had my baby in high school and that you were going to put him up for adoption without even telling me? Is that what Jesus would do?’ I’m not making this up.”
His father must have as big a personality as John to say that.
“Needless to say, they didn’t invite me over to tell me Bible stories, and we didn’t go back to that church.” John made eye contact as if expecting a reaction.
“I can see why.” Churches were full of imperfect people and hypocrites, but to turn away their grandchild? Maybe they needed to be in church and learn about grace and compassion as much as anyone.
“Not long after that, my dad took me to a park to meet my birth mom. She bought me ice cream and asked me questions. Told me about her baby girl and showed me pictures. I was on my best behavior, thinking I’d have a mom and get to spend time with her. It didn’t go like I pictured. No hugging me, saying she was sorry or made a mistake not raising me. Instead, it became a once-a-year thing. Usually at a park. She’d bring a gift—something nice to lessen her guilt.” He turned into the restaurant parking lot.
“Wow, that’s a lot.” Elizabeth’s heart ached, picturing a young John desperate for his mother’s love. At least she’d had that. This could definitely give him abandonment issues and explained his desperate need to find Boss.
“She started bringing her kids—a boy and another girl. Guess she figured they’d find out about me someday. But it’s not like they thought of me as their brother. I’ve got my dad and that set of grandparents, and my Army family, though. Now you know my life story. You can analyze me later. Let’s focus on Ariana.”
ChapterNineteen
SHAKE IT OFF – Taylor Swift
“Table for two?”The young hostess picked up menus.
“Yes. I’d like that booth in the back.”
With John in full mission mode, Elizabeth let him take lead following the hostess.
John stopped in the middle of the dining room. “Excuse me.” He tapped an empty table. “There’s someone coming in a few minutes we need to keep an eye on. Female, early twenties with long, dark hair. A guy her age will be joining her. I need you to put them at this table.” He handed the hostess a folded bill.
“If you’re planning on spying on your daughter and her date, I think she’ll notice you.” The girl craned her neck to look up at him.
“Daughter? No. She’s just a friend, and she asked us to be here.”
“Ah, an internet date. I get it.” The hostess palmed the bill.
John took the seat giving him a full view of the dining area. Their server brought them water and bowls of chips and salsa.
As Elizabeth looked over the menu, John gave a hand signal. She turned to see the hostess seat Ariana. Ariana’s ruffled, off-the-shoulder, navy dress definitely sent a this-is-a-date vibe. So much for Elizabeth’s hope this was to simply give Ariana closure.
