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The sound of the clock ticking on her wall was not enough background noise to dull the ringing in her ears. She stood, the room spinning, everything going in and out of focus, and sweat beading her brow.
Sorrow for the loss of one of her best friends assaulted her, claimed every part of her, and was sucking the very life from her. Guilt that she hadn’t seen him as much as she should since she left wracked her, made her feel like a worthless piece of shit person.
You didn’t say goodbye. You should have talked to him more, made an effort to go back home and see him.
She squeezed her eyes again, sucking in air, feeling dizzy, like she was in a prison and there was never any chance of her escaping.
She didn’t get to say goodbye.
I didn’t get to tell him that I loved him, that he was such a good friend.
She would finally be going home again after being away for so many years. Even if she’d spoken to the guys during that time, it wouldn’t be a happy reunion. No, she was going back to watch Christian being buried.
God, can I even get through this? Can I go back and see Riley and Tallin and not have a breakdown?
Thinking about the other two men that had been part of their quartet made her heart hurt, made every part of her tighten. How could she face them with such tragedy hanging over them?
They’d stayed in Burkett, Colorado this whole time, and she knew they’d spent time with Christian. This had to be earth-shattering to them.
Sitting back on the bed, she breathed out and ran her hand over her eyes.
She might not know if she could do this, but she didn’t have a choice.
ChapterTwo
Back home
Lilly pulled her car into the small, rundown gas station that was about thirty minutes outside of Burkett—the town she’d grown up in.
She stopped in front of one of the two pumps, both brown and rusted around the edges, making it clear they’d been here a while.
A bell chimed twice and signaled the attendant to come out to pump the patron’s gas. It was old school, but then again a lot of things in Burkett were that way
A grease splattered young man jogged toward her car, mindful of the dusting of snow and ice covering the ground. Pellets of salt had been thrown down, but it was still snowing, and she knew it would be for the next few months.
Winter had finally come to Burkett, and it wouldn’t be leaving anytime soon.
She rolled the driver’s side window down when he stopped in front of it, a big grin pasted on his dirty face.
“What can I do for you, Miss?”
“Can you please fill the tank up?” She leaned back in her seat as he pumped the gas, her mind blank and void of any and all emotion. She would not cry in the parking lot of a gas station.
It was during the quiet times that she remembered the good times she had had with her boys.
They had been called the Quartet ever since they were toddlers. Christian Reive had always been the rambunctious one with a head full of auburn hair and eyes so blue they rivaled the Caribbean. No one had been surprised when he opened his own construction company.
He built incredible cabins and buildings in Burkett and the surrounding areas. Christian’s talent had built the place where Riley now resided.
Tallin Draven had always been the strong and silent type, the ladies’ man as the other boys had dubbed him. He’d joined the military after college and moved up the ranks to become Special Ops.
But he also had that bad boy streak going on, with the leather jacket, the Harley, and even tattoos on his muscular body.
But last she heard he was no longer on active duty, and living in Burkett again.
Riley McKnight was the brains of the group, the sweet, caring friend that had always been her shoulder to cry on, always been there to talk to when she had something on her mind. His gentleness and intelligence had taken him in the right direction and profession.
That intelligence made him the best doctor in their area, in Colorado, if anyone asked her. Then there had been her, the only girl in Burkett who had dared to put up with the three of them.
