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“It was the end of her shift. I’ve taken over your table,” the server explains.
“No, I needed to talk to her. Do you know how I can get ahold of her?” I ask almost frantically. This has to be kismet. After everything with Carter tonight, the forces are working in my favor.
Brett gives me a look like he thinks I’m insane.
“Sorry, I can’t give out another employee’s personal information,” the server responds like she finds me dense.
“Right,” I say, feeling defeated.
When my steak comes, I feel like I’ve lost my appetite. I clink beers with Evan, wishing him a happy birthday, but my mind feels like I’ve entered a whirlpool on high speed with so many memories and regrets washing over me.
“This steak is freaking good,” Evan says, chewing on a piece and pointing his knife at the large piece of meat.
“I told you.” Brett grins, digging into his steak.
“What the hell is wrong with you?” Kaleb asks me as he stares at the steak on my plate.
“She’s the reason I fought with Carter tonight,” I say to the guys.
“What, did he steal your girl?” Kaleb asks.
“Not exactly. We broke up, and the weasel slithered into her arms,” I say. Back in the day, my heart felt cold and black. I had been through so much, I didn’t feel like I had anything real to give, and Skylar deserved everything.
“So you really can’t be pissed then, you let her go,” Evan says.
“I want her back,” I tell my friends.
“Bro, how long has it been?” Brett laughs.
“Over seven years. I tried looking for her is the truth. When Devon and I were in the car crash, it’s her face that flashed before my eyes.”
“Is that why you haven’t hooked up with anyone since the accident?” Evan asks. That’s a little personal, but I guess he feels he has the right to ask after we were in college together and lived in the same hockey house. Back then, I had been all about hooking up with randoms because feeling anything real didn’t seem possible.
I give him a sheepish look. “Don’t go psychoanalyzing me now.”
Evan nods.
“So it is,” Brett says. “Damn, bro, you should’ve come to me, and I would’ve talked some sense into you. The girl has moved on and has her own life after seven years. You have to stop pining.”
“I can’t stop,” I admit, dropping my fork. This whole conversation is making me anxious. I’ve thought about Skylar a lot over the past three years. Now here she is. I don’t care what the guys say. It has to mean something. “But I don’t want to talk about this anymore.”
The guys respect my wishes. Instead, they talk about our away game in two days.
After we finish at the diner, we take an Uber back to Midtown. Anxious energy is still rolling off me in waves. The guys all live in the same building as me since the team owns the apartments. Evan and I are neighbors, and when I reach my door, he says, “Bro, you got to get it together. I saw you in college. What’s happening now isn’t you,” he says.
I nod because I’m too emotionally spent to talk to him. The thing is, Evan has it wrong. The guy I was in college wasn’t the real me. That was the me who was hurting, the me who suffered a horrible loss and was trying to deal with it the best way he knew how. This was the real me, and now I knew where Skylar worked. She may still have bad feelings toward me, but I need to see her. I have to set things right.
CHAPTERTWO
Liam
Freshman Year High School
Mom and Dad are having another shouting match, and I take a pillow and place it over my face as I lie in bed, but it isn’t enough to drown out the arguing which seems to happen more and more often.
That’s it, I’ve had enough.
I throw the pillow to the hardwood floor and get up from bed. I walk over to my window. It’s a nice size and has a small balcony. It’s late summer, and I’m only wearing basketball shorts, so I put on a T-shirt. From the balcony, I use the waterspout to hang on to as I slowly lower myself down to the ground. It’s made of metal and doesn’t feel very strong, but I make it down, landing barefoot in the grass.Damn.I should’ve thrown a pair of running shoes down first.
