AllFreeNovel
Share Us
Oh he must! Now go back to watching something with Michael Landon in it. We got this!
And the devil booted the angel off my shoulder. Angel Stillman landed in a mound of artificial snow with a soft “oof” and his robes over his head.
The words rested on the tip of my tongue, then sat there, growing sour as fear slipped in.
“All I want from you is what we do in bed,” I replied and kissed him hard, ensuring that no other words came falling out of my face. Words expressing how I wanted his love, his commitment. How I wanted to be one half of a whole instead of one half of an empty shell. But those words had been spoken before and I still carried the heartache, pathetic as that was.
When the kiss broke, he chased it, but I stepped away from him because that same golf cart was coming back with several people in it. If he wanted to say more, the time wasn’t now. Not that I imagined there was much he could say. When the movie was wrapped, he would go back to LA and I’d be here, so why pledge troths when we both knew this had a very short shelf life. If I was in charge, things wouldn’t hurt so deeply when he climbed on the big silver bird and flew home.
“If you’re sure?”
I nodded, unsure as fuck, and took another step away, the lights around my ankles nearly sending me to my ass alongside my voice of reason.
“I’m sure,” I stated, pulled the wires from around us, then stepped free.
“Okay then. If that’s all I can have of you, then that’s what I’ll take.” He strode away from me, paused, and then turned back to offer me his hand. “Let’s go to bed.”
I waited, suddenly struck by Medusa’s curse of some sort. What the hell was I doing?! Was I seriously considering falling into bed with the man who had broken me so badly I’d never been able to completely heal emotionally? What the fuck was wrong with me?
“Are you coming?” he asked, extending his long fingers and closing them as my hand grasped his. He took a step. My cement feet held us in place behind the pines, the sounds of laughter and Christmas carols moving past in the dark, cold night. “Come on then, let’s go. I want to feel you inside me.”
Stillman, you simpleton, pick up those monstrous feet of yours! Left, right, left, right. Come on! You’ve been walking since you were ten months old! Get moving. His tight ass is yours for the taking.
“No,” I croaked.
FFS.
Yay!Drifted up from the laundry powder we stood in.
Did they even use laundry soap for fake snow in movies anymore? Didn’t have a fucking clue. Probably not. Christ, I was old and stupid and screwing up something that I had dreamed of for years. Revenge sex with Tony. Fucking him so well and so thoroughly that he would live in regret for leaving me behind.
“No?” he enquired, his hand falling to his side. He turned to face me, his dark hair glowing red, green, red, green, red, green as he studied me intently. “Why no?”
“Because I don’t want that from you. With you. Whatever.” I reached up to find my cap, only to realize it was gone. So I rubbed at my skull so hard sparks were probably flying. “I want more than sex. And I know we can’t have that because your heart belongs to the cinema and mine lives here in Rockmount.”
“What if I said I wanted more with you?”
I pushed in on my temples with the heels of my hands. “But you don’t!” I growled like a wounded animal. “You never wanted more with me. If you did, you wouldn’t have left.”
He drew in a long, shaky breath. His shoulders fell and his eyes closed. “Stillman, I made a mistake.”
My eyes flared. “You made a mistake?”
“Yes, I made a mistake. I should have asked you to come with me,” he said, his gaze roaming over my face as I massaged my cranium in an attempt to try to knead the confusion out. Which didn’t work, but I had no clue what else to do with my hands. If I let go of my head, I would either throttle the man or sweep him off his feet and carry him to the hay mound in the wedding barn. “I should have tried my hand at Broadway if you said no, and you would have said no, I know that.”
“You don’t know that! How could you fucking know that if you never asked me?!” I barked, winced at the pressure on my thick head, and dropped my hands to my sides. They instantly fisted into tight balls. “I would have followed you to the ends of the fucking earth, you idiot. Christ! When I told you I loved you, I meant it. I still love you!”
Oops. Fuck.
His dark eyes rounded. Then, he smiled, just a little one, a mere tickle of a twitch at the corners of his recently kissed mouth.
“I still love you too,” he whispered just as Teddy came barreling around the tree shouting at us to show ourselves. Could I go to prison for swatting my deputy upside the head? I’d have to Google that later.
“Hands up where I can—” Teddy’s gaze flew from Tony to me. It was kind of funny to see the shift from uptight to oh shit. “Sheriff? Uhm, what are you doing back here? One of the key grips said some shifty characters were skulking around out here.”
“We’re the shifty characters,” I told Teddy as I bent down to pick up my hat. I jammed it down onto my head. “I was checking the lights on the trees to make sure they weren’t a fire hazard when Tony came along and offered to help.”
“Oh-kay,” Teddy murmured as his sight darted from me to Tony. I prayed that the now icy-cold spunk in my shorts hadn’t soaked through to my trousers. “Are they?”
