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It was just like old times with my siblings talking as they set the table. Mom had made her famous lasagna, and we all eagerly filled our plates and passed around the garlic bread.
As we ate, we caught up on each other’s lives. I smiled, feeling grateful for this moment. It wasn’t often that we were all together like this, but when we were, it felt like nothing had changed.
54
EMILIE
The days that followed my return to Norway were filled with a heavy sadness that settled deep within me. It seeped into my bones. I struggled to find the energy to even get out of bed. If I didn’t have to, I wasn’t going to do anything.
Astrid knocked on my bedroom door. I knew it was her knock because she was the only one that came to my door. I rolled over to face the window. I heard her footsteps coming into the room.
“Emilie,” she said, sighing. “You told me you were going to be reading.”
“I did. And I got tired, so I took a nap.”
“You have to get up,” she said. “Your father wanted me to tell you he wants you at dinner. Dressed.”
I rolled my eyes. “I don’t want to go.”
“I’m sure you don’t, but he wasn’t making a request.”
I groaned again. “Tell him I’m sick.”
“He thought you might say that. He told me to tell you to be at his table at seven or he would carry you to his table.”
I made my way to the grand dining room of the palace, I felt an overwhelming mix of anger, frustration, and sorrow building up inside me. Part of the reason I was staying away from my parents was to protect them. I was so furious with them. I knew I was going to explode on them. I didn’t want to, but if they pushed me, I didn’t think I had the self-control to keep my mouth shut.
I took my seat at the ornate table. “It’s nice to finally see you,” my father said.
I said nothing as the servants began serving our meal. My emotions threatened to spill over. My parents were acting like there was nothing wrong. Everything was totally normal. My father was saying something about the Scotland property, and I couldn’t keep my mouth shut.
“I can’t do this anymore,” I began, my voice trembling with pent-up frustration. “I can’t live my life trying to make you proud, to uphold the family name, and to carry the weight of a crown I never asked for. I’m done. I can’t do it.”
My father raised an eyebrow. “Emilie, what are you talking about?”
I couldn’t hold back any longer. “You’ve pressured me to choose duty over love, to sacrifice my own happiness for the sake of our country and the family legacy. But I never wanted the crown, and I’m tired of pretending that I do. I’m tired of always trying to meet your expectations. I sacrificed love and now you’ve sacrificed your windfall of cash.”
“What are you talking about?” my father asked.
“And now, because of this relentless pressure, I’ve lost the one person who made me truly happy, who made me believe in love again. I hurt him. I hurt a good man who deserved better. And now, he doesn’t want me. He’s not going to marry me. So good job. Congratulations. You’re going to have to pawn me off on someone else.”
My confession hung in the air. The room fell into a tense silence. My parents looked at each other with shock and confusion.
“Emilie, we have always acted in the best interest of our country. Our family has a legacy to uphold, and sometimes sacrifices must be made.” My father’s declaration was exactly what I expected. He couldn’t care less about the fact my heart was broken.
“Is it worth it?” I asked, my voice quivering but determined. “Is it worth sacrificing love and happiness for power and duty?”
“Do you mean to say Theo has broken off the match?” My father’s tone was gruff and full of anger.
“Yes,” I said. “He wants a marriage that is based on love. He’s not going to settle. I resisted, but it happened. I fell in love with the man I’m not supposed to feel anything for. I let your rules destroy the only relationship I’ve really loved.”
“That wasn’t our intention,” my mother said. “We never wanted to burden you.”
I snorted. “Yes, you did. That’s all this has been about. I’m carrying the burden of your mistakes and your mismanagement. It’s not fair. It’s not fair that I have to give up on the idea of love because you guys don’t care about it.”
“That’s not true,” Mom said. “We never meant to make you think that. Right, Magnus?”
My father grumbled and mumbled but finally nodded.
