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“No, dear, you can go.”
I nodded and headed for the door, anxious to get out of the room before they demanded I do anything else to secure their financial future. I did feel like a pawn. I was a chip to be cashed in.Sell off in case of emergencyshould have been tattooed on my ass.
I walked back upstairs, carefully avoiding the spot I knew was weak. I didn’t want to fall through the rotting wood. Astrid was waiting for me, arranging an assortment of accessories for me to pair with my outfit.
“I’m showering,” I said and walked directly into the bathroom.
The picnic, which awaited me later in the day, was a chance for all Wed season attendees to come together and socialize. It was supposed to be another opportunity to form connections, alliances, and friendships. I knew I had to play the game. I was expected to work with Theo to create our own little social group for when we were all married.
As I finished my morning tea with my parents, I couldn’t help but wonder what Theo was doing just then. Was he getting his orders from his parents? Were they demanding he manipulate me to make sure they got the appropriate titles?
“Are you okay?” Astrid asked.
“I’m fine.”
“I know it’s a lot of pressure,” she said. “I think you’re a lot stronger than you know. You’re going to get through this. Theo is a good guy. You could certainly do worse. Be glad you have a strong man that will stand by you.”
“You’re right,” I said. “I just have so much to think about.”
“Maybe Theo will give you some guidance,” she said. “Go out there and talk to him. He’ll help you sort it out.”
“I can’t help but feel like he is getting a rotten deal,” I said. “I’ll never love him. I know I have to have a couple of children, but that doesn’t mean love. The guy really believes people in our situation can love each other.”
“I think you can develop a certain fondness for one another,” she said thoughtfully. “He will be your best friend. He is going to be the one person that will understand what you’re going through.”
“I don’t think so.” I shook my head. “Look at my parents. They get along but it’s more of a business arrangement. They act like they are coworkers. More like my father is the boss and my mother is the assistant. I don’t believe they love each other.”
Astrid shrugged. “But that doesn’t mean you can’t have a different kind of love with Theo. Something that goes beyond your arrangement. Something real.”
I sighed, feeling the weight of my future pressing down on me. “I just don’t know if that’s possible.”
“You won’t know unless you try,” Astrid said with a determined look in her eyes.
I smiled and rose from the chair. “Now, you sound like him.”
I stared down at the accessory combinations she put together for me and selected a rose quartz bracelet and matching earrings. The royal blue blouse made the jewelry pop, and I felt a sense of confidence wash over me.
“You look beautiful,” she said, smiling.
I laughed and looked down at myself. “I am so much more comfortable in jeans. I wish I could wear them to every event.”
“Come on, you have to love getting to dress up like a real princess,” she teased.
“I am a real princess.”
She burst into laughter. “Yes, but you rarely look like a fairytale princess.”
“Good point. I should go. I don’t want to be late. I’m already going to be the gossip of the day after what Theo did yesterday.”
“They’re jealous,” she said firmly. “I bet they all wish their men would do the same for them. You’ve got a real man and they are stuck with their fops.”
I couldn’t help but flash a coy smile. “He is very manly.”
“Ha! See? You do like him.”
“He is tolerable,” I corrected. “I’ve already said he’s handsome. I don’t deny that at all. That does not mean I love him.”
“But it seems like it would be easier to love someone you are attracted to.”
