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“Your perfect… dick?” Selena’s eyes are wide. “Yup, going to need to hear all about that.” Selena presses her hand against Jacks’ face. “Don’t worry, Nugget, I’ll tell Lily how great your dick is, too.”
“Ugh, gross. Please don’t, I beg you,” I tell her, pretending to gag.
“Flattered as always, Lil,” Jacks mutters under his breath, as he hands me my gin and tonic.
“Love you, best friend forever!” I reply, laughing at him, and tilting my face to squint up at him.
I’ve said something like that to him a million times. But not in front of my boyfriend. My boyfriend who I haven’t told I love yet.
Oh, shit.
Jameson squeezes my hip, like somehow he knows I’m panicking. But how could he possibly know that? He reassures me without even having to try.
Leaning up on my tiptoes, I reach up to press my lips against Jameson’s. His arm wraps tightly around me like it always does. His broken arm rests over my shoulder. I really miss having both of his arms holding me tight. But I know that he’ll be holding me like that again the minute he gets his cast off. “Don’t say anything I wouldn’t want you to say, kid. See you in a bit.”
Jameson swipes his tongue across my bottom lip, but he lets me go when I pull away to go talk to Selena.
chapter forty-seven
jameson
Jacks and I watch Lily and Selena walk away, talking and laughing. Every so often, Selena looks back at me over her shoulder, her eyes wide.
I can only imagine what Lily’s telling her right now. But from the looks of it, Selena’s impressed with whatever it is.
When they go sit down on bales of hay by the fire pit no one’s lit yet, I turn back to my brother. He’s staring at me, frowning. He’s six years older than me, just like Lily. The years between me and Lily feel like nothing at all. But Jacks has always felt so much older than me. My big brother left home at eighteen, got famous as an actor, and made millions upon millions of dollars. He’s a damn movie star. Nothing I did was ever going to compare to that.
Then I started fucking his best friend.
And then I fell in love with her.
I don’t even know where to start, except with an apology.
“Hey, man. Sorry about that.”
Jacks frowns at me, his eyebrows almost turning into a unibrow. “What part are you sorry for? Fucking my best friend behind my back for months or for me having to hear her talk about your perfect dick?”
“Both, I guess.” Even if I don’t mind Lily telling whoever she wants about my perfect dick and just how much she likes it. And even if I can never really be sorry for sneaking around with Lily because it got us to where we are right now. But I am sorry we hurt any of the people we love. I’m sorry we hurt my brother.
“Did you always have a thing for her?”
“I always liked her. I always thought she was pretty and those tits, well.” When Jacks holds up a hand to stop me, I shrug. “But no, I wasn’t secretly in love with her this whole time.”
“You’re in love with her?”
I smile. “Kind of hard not to be.”
“Just… take care of her.”
“I will, Jacks. I promise. I just broke my damn arm to protect her little horse. That’s nothing compared to what I’d do to keep her safe.”
“Her heart, too? She acts tough, but she’s not, you know.”
“I know it. And I’m pretty sure the only heart in trouble here is mine. I don’t know if she loves me. Sometimes, I think she might. But then I say something dumb, and she gets pissed at me. And I’m not sure she could ever love me. Why the hell would she?”
“You’re my little brother, Jameson.”
I take a long pull on my beer before answering. “I’m aware. I’ve been Jackson Waters’ little brother my whole life.”
