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“It was probably considered forward back then.”
While he smiled, it didn’t seem sincere. His pain remained evident in his eyes.
“I’m sorry, Beau.”
He cocked his head. “For?”
“Reminding you of your mother.”
When he turned and cupped my cheek, it startled me, but I didn’t react outwardly. “You remind me of her so often.” When he leaned closer, I held my breath, wondering if he’d kiss me—hoping, really. Instead, he rested his forehead against mine. “Everything good in her, I see in you,” he added.
“Thank you,” I whispered, too stunned by his words to think of anything else to say. I couldn’t imagine being bestowed a more touching compliment.
Beau dropped his hand and took a step back. “I have few regrets in life. Perhaps others would suggest I should have many more. However, one is that I didn’t spend Christmas with my parents this year.”
“The wedding.” Noah Ridge and his wife, Seraphina, had chosen the day for their ceremony. Given Ridge and Beau, along with Beau’s brother, were all best friends, that’s where he was, rather than with his family.
He nodded. “Another is that you and my mum didn’t have the chance to know each other better. I feel as though I’ve known you my whole life, yet the two of you didn’t meet until recently. Odd, that.”
I shrugged. “It wasn’t like we could have sleepovers.”
This time when he smiled, it felt more genuine. “Not like we do now. And I suppose you’re right. It would’ve been inappropriate to invite a girl over for a play date.” His eyebrows wiggled. He picked up the jacket I set on a chair when we came in and held it for me. “Shall we?” he asked after putting his own on.
“I should get my gloves and hat from the car,” I said when we left the room and were about to get on the elevator.
“Hold on.” He returned to the room, then came out a minute later holding two hats and sets of gloves. “I remembered to retrieve them earlier.”
“Such a gentleman,” I said, smiling up at him.
He smiled too, but his brow furrowed.
“I hope I didn’t just insult you,” I teased.
Beau laughed out loud. “Not at all. It’s just your smile…”
My eyes scrunched. “What about it?”
Like earlier, he cupped my cheek. “You remind me so much of her.”
Would he kiss me now? God, how I wanted him to.
The elevator door opened, ruining the moment, or perhaps saving me from embarrassing myself further. No doubt, I was gazing at him the way most women did. Beau dropped his hand, and we stepped inside.
While it was chilly,I didn’t feel cold once we walked outside and Beau tucked my arm in his. We’d gone a half a block to where several shops and restaurants dotted Main Street when snow began to fall. Softly, though. That, coupled with the lampposts being wrapped with lit garland, made it feel almost surreal. Banners painted with Christmas scenes hung from each post, and sleighs pulled by horses carried people up one side of the street and down the other.
Like the Lilacs, it all felt too perfect—as though I’d stepped into a holiday card. It was the antithesis of my dismal life in California.
My feelings had been hurt when Beau asked if my highest aspirations in life were to work in a bar and live in a studio apartment. Of course, that wasn’t the case. However, I had no idea how to change my circumstances.
I’d grown up poor, living in a community where people like my mom and me worked for people like Beau and his family. There was almost no middle ground between the impoverished and the obscenely wealthy. In the greater metropolitan area surrounding San Luis Obispo, there was, but not in the village of Cambria.
I’d graduated from Fresno State three years ago with a BS in Agricultural Business, but when I applied for jobs, no one even contacted me for an interview. At the time, I’d considered asking my boss at Stave, Alex Butler, if her family or her husband’s needed any help at their wineries, but just like if I’d asked Beau, it didn’t feel right. Instead, I worked at the wine bar and was eventually made manager.
Thankfully, because we were so poor, my education had been paid for via financial aid, so I didn’t have student loans to reimburse after I graduated.
Maybe I should’ve tried harder to get a better job, but with my mom’s death a couple of years ago, it was easier to stay where I was.
Having no other work experience besides helping my mom clean houses when I was younger, how in the world would I manage a place like the Lilacs? We got sidetracked, talking about Cena dying on Christmas day earlier when I commented that I hoped there weren’t still horses on the property. That was another thing I’d have no idea what to do about. I’d ridden a horse—once—and was terrified the entire time.
