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My stare snapped to his before shifting to Dylan’s, but he looked away and cleared his throat.
“I’m sorry,” he said with a small jerk of his shoulders. “Didn’t want to bring that up, but you had to know why we can’t let you be with her.”
With a hard nod, I turned and walked out of the bar, ignoring when Sam called my name.
I knew what I had to do. I just didn’t know how to do it in a way that would convince her.
* * *
“You’re back already?” Maci asked before my front door even shut behind her. “I thought you were going out after work.”
I didn’t move from my position in the kitchen even though everything about her voice and having her seek me out as soon as I came home made me want to wrap her in my arms and hold her for the rest of the night. Instead, I stared blankly into the fridge while trying to ready myself for this.
Ever since I’d left the bar twenty minutes before, I’d been repeatedly telling myself this was for Maci’s own good. That it might upset her at first, but in the long run, it was what she needed.
I could get through the next few minutes if I just held onto that thought.
“I didn’t know I had to give you a play-by-play of what I was doing,” I said, my tone cold and detached.
“Whoa, what’s wrong?” she asked as she entered the kitchen. “Did something happen at work?”
“Jesus, Maci, nothing is wrong. I just needed a night where you weren’t demanding every second of my time.” I grabbed a beer and shut the door with more force than necessary as I turned to look at her. Nearly abandoning everything when I saw the surprise and hurt in her eyes.
“What?” she asked on a breath, and I felt my chest sink at the pain in her voice, but I’d already begun. I couldn’t stop now.
“Did you ever stop to think that my life revolves around things other than you? That I might need space to see people who aren’t you? Because that’s the way this usually works.”
“What works?”
“Sleeping around with people,” I said offhandedly, even though it felt like I was going to throw up. Turning my back on her, I took long pulls from my beer and tried not to choke at the thought of being with anyone else, or of her with another guy. “I wanted to prove something to you, Mini. I wanted to show you what you were missing by just being with that preppy asshole. But I think I’ve more than proved that by now.”
Silence engulfed the kitchen for long seconds before she shakily asked, “What the hell did you just call me?”
I forced an irritated expression when I turned toward her again, but this was Maci, and she was struggling not to cry because of me. The sight made me want to tear out my heart and offer it to her.
“God, Maci, grow up,” I muttered. “It’s a damn name.”
“Why are you doing this?” she pled as she stepped toward me. “What happened today?”
“I have someone coming over, so you can’t be here,” I said when she reached for me.
“You—what? Connor!” she begged when I grabbed her wrist and started hauling her out of my apartment. “Why are you doing this? This isn’t you.”
“Shit, enough,” I said as I released her near her apartment door. “Stop making this so dramatic when it doesn’t have to be. I’m just tired of pretending with you.”
Thought I was going to fall to my knees and blow everything when she grabbed at her chest and stomach as the tears slipped down her cheeks.
“Pretending?” she breathed as her gaze fell to the floor.
“I shouldn’t have let it go on this long, but you need to find someone else. Get a boyfriend or something—one you aren’t afraid to introduce to your brothers.”
Her eyes snapped to mine and widened. “Is that what this is about? Because I’ll tell them about us right now, I swear.”
“No, fuck, that isn’t what I meant. You need to find the guy you’re meant to be with, and I’m not him.”
“How can you say that? I belong with you...to you. I’m yours, Connor. Completely yours,” she confessed, her voice twisting around the words. “Can’t you see that you own me?”
Fuck.
