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She squints. “I’m afraid you’re mistaking me for one of your girls—”
The elevator jerks into motion.
“Thank God this is over,” she says before tearing her gaze away from mine, staring in front of her. “Not a minute too soon.”
“We finally agree on something,” I say.
Chapter 4
Arianne
‘IS YOUR VAGINA INCENSED? BITTER, MAYBE? MEN CAN SMELL IT.’
I snort, reading the headline.
“Yeah, well, my vagina is also infuriated, indignant, angry, and spitting fire,” I say, before taking another sip of my coffee. “Cobwebs? My vagina is well past that. It’s a minefield at this point and I bet it lets off a strong signal and smell, telling men, Stay the hell away.” I let out a sarcastic laugh.
I wonder if my roomie from this morning could smell my angry vagina?
As I scroll down the article, my lightheartedness dissipates and a familiar discomfort sets in. I sigh. “My vagina is also very, very lonely.”
Now I’m depressed.
Thanks for nothing, Cosmo.
I flip the iPad over, uninterested in letting a nonscientific-based article in a woman’s magazine, written to make you feel sorry for yourself, affect my mood.
“There’s a reason I stick to Cosmo quizzes and stay away from the flimsy articles.”
My phone rings.
I answer the call, a grin already stretching my lips.
“Are you finally in LA?” my best friend Phoebe asks.
“Yes, I’m officially an Angeleno!” I say.
“YAY!”
“My ears!”
“Well, excuse me for being excited.”
“I’m just teasing. I love your reaction.”
Phoebe Pedersen and I have been best friends since we became roommates in college.
“Welcome to the City of Angels, chica!”
“What kind of lame welcoming committee is this?” I ask. “No Glad you’re back banner. No champagne. No wine. No charcuterie board. No chocolate fountain. Not even cake. You’re on the other side of the planet. We can’t even go for coffee or drinks to celebrate.”
“Someone is demanding,” she says. “I may not physically be present in LA, but I haven’t forgotten. The only reason I didn’t call sooner was because I was in the air and landed in Hong Kong three hours ago.”
“You’re the best, Phoebe.”
“Of course I am.” I can see her beaming smile from here. “Jetlagged?”
“It’s ridiculous.”
