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Initially, seeing beautiful images of Jaek suddenly flashing by in between modules of the training took me aback. I realized then that it had not been the first time. For some reason, my conscious mind had not noticed it, as the images were undoubtedly meant to be subliminal messages to further endear Jaek to me.
That I consciously saw them now was what tipped me off. I also found myself able to let my mind wander instead of the almost supernatural focus that Deimos’s compulsion had imposed on me. While the ultimate test would have been to end or pause the simulation, I thought better of it. I couldn’t risk the device snitching on me. But that did not prevent me from disobeying the command of remaining seated.
Since the visor filled my entire vision with an immersive simulation, I couldn’t risk trying to move around the room without falling or injuring myself. As I was still aware of my body and could feel the couch beneath me, I pushed myself up to my feet. When no eye and brain stabbing sensation manifested itself, as was usually the case whenever I disobeyed the compulsion, I almost squealed with joy.
But I had to be careful. Although there didn’t seem to be any hidden cameras or microphones in my quarters, I couldn’t take any chances. I also needed to pass each of the damn tests from the modules so that I would be allowed to see Jaek. He was our only hope of getting out here.
Over the next couple of days, despite drinking the juice every morning when Deimos brought me breakfast, its effects continued to wear off even earlier during the day. I started to form a number of hypotheses as to what could be the cause.
My initial thought had been that I had developed some form of natural immunity. But that seemed improbable. Otherwise, Deimos would have likely noticed it also occurring with the men. My second thought was that maybe me being a woman affected the way I responded to the serum. After all, all the victims had been males. With the Sarenians’ pledge to never hurt females, they wouldn’t have properly tested it on one of us. Then this morning, I noticed how my own scent had changed. At the same time my nipples had grown very sensitive.
And this led to my third hypothesis. As a hybrid female, although my reproductive systems mostly favored my Braxian heritage, I still displayed some minor human physiological reactions. While I had thankfully been spared the bleeding and cramps during a human woman’s menstrual cycle, I still got very sensitive nipples—and an overactive libido—during that time. Biology wasn’t my forte, but I knew enough to be aware of the hormonal changes that occurred within a woman’s body during that time. And my gut said those hormones were messing with Deimos’s serum.
This also meant I had a very small window to act, not only for that temporary immunity to the serum, but especially to rescue Keran and the others. The Goddess only knew what state they were in at this point. Thinking of the purebloods now systematically stirred a negative response from me. Knowing it was artificial, I would constantly remind myself those feelings weren’t mine but imposed. Had I still been under the effects of the compulsion, I wouldn’t have been able to fight it like this without suffering significant pain.
On the evening of the fifth day, Deimos returned with my supper. As had become our ritual, I would eat while he reviewed the results of my virtual tests. Then he would set the program for the next day, give me a few compulsions as to what I should do in the morning, and leave.
But I stopped him before he got to that part. As soon as he finished complimenting me for my great score, I seized my chance.
“Thank you,” I said. “I do find the training quite fascinating.”
“I’m glad to hear it,” he said approvingly.
Pretending to be nervous, I tucked a strand of hair behind my ear and licked my lips. “I have successfully completed the first five modules. You had mentioned that if I passed my tests, I would be able to see Jaek.”
“I never mentioned a name,” Deimos said, his eyes narrowing at me.
“You didn’t?” I asked, faking surprise.
“I did not,” he repeated firmly.
This time, an uneasy feeling settled in the pit of my stomach. I had naturally assumed he meant Jaek. Surely he wasn’t thinking of Vintor? Itcouldn’tbe Vintor. The training had images of Jaek embedded in it.
But my conscious mind wouldn’t have picked it up if not for the drug wearing off.
Fuck! Realizing I was about to give myself away, I quickly found a reply I hoped would pacify him.
“But itisJaek, right?” I asked, making no effort to hide the wariness in my voice. “You said that person was my soulmate, the person I had loved all along and who had patiently been waiting for me. The only person who meets that description is Jaek.”
Deimos tilted his head to the side, his icy blue eyes studying my reactions. “And what if I told you it’s not Jaek.”
I flinched, my stomach dropping. “Then we’re going to have a problem. He’s the only one I truly ever had feelings for. And over the past few days, he’s been occupying my every thought. If you had someone else in mind, then never mind.”
Deimos lifted an eyebrow. I couldn’t say if it expressed amusement or doubt.
“Why this sudden interest for Jaek?” he challenged.
I shrugged. “It’s not sudden. I always had feelings for him. Strong ones. And he’s always been so kind and respectful to me. The day the Veredian healer mended him, Jaek asked me to move to Braxia with him. I was very tempted,” I said truthfully. “But hearing you say the one who had been patiently waiting for me was my true soulmate struck a nerve and made me look at my relationship with Jaek with new eyes. I think you are right, that Jaek and I are soulmates. I just really want to see him. And I won’t lie that being locked up in this room all day by myself hasn’t been easy,” I added with a nervous laugh.
Deimos nodded slowly, his gaze still intensely studying me, no doubt in search of deceit. “And what of the pureblood Keran?”
I instinctively scrunched my face—the disgusted reaction automatically triggered by my training whenever I thought of a pureblood. While I would normally chastise myself for it and rationalize why this reaction didn’t come from the true Dawn, I welcomed it this time.
“He was just a fling,” I said, waving a dismissive hand. “I’ve been pretending to be human my whole life. By their standards, I’m not exactly an attractive woman. So I guess that having a crown prince fawn over me and call me beautiful flattered me. In the end, he was just using me, preying on my insecurities to get what he wanted. He offered me a job on Braxia, but that was likely only to give himself a good conscience. We both know the future Magnar would never marry a half-breed with no wealth, no connections, no impressive degrees or skills to bring to the table. I just deluded myself into indulging in a fairy tale.”
Even though I spoke those words to placate the Sarenian, they rang far too true to my own ears. What future would there truly have been between Keran and me?
“I’m glad to hear you finally see the truth of it,” Deimos said in a gentle voice. “For what it’s worth, physical beauty is in the eye of the beholder. You may not fit the aesthetic of some other species, but by your own, you are a stunning female. And what others think of you is irrelevant. The ones who matter see you in all your glory. To Jaek, there is no woman more beautiful than you are.”
