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The disappointment had screamed from every syllable.
Well, she was disappointed, too. She was disappointed in herself. You’re not the young insecure girl you used to be. You’re a grown woman who can make mindful choices. You know your value. You know what you mean to Billy.
Yes, she did know. But it would be nice to hear it from the man himself. He’d said he was “serious,” but he hadn’t said he loved her.
He’s being careful. He doesn’t want to upset the balance that we’re used to. He wants to respect my boundaries.
Which made him a good man, more mature and thoughtful than he used to be. But it also meant they were at a stalemate. He didn’t want to cross a line, and she was still mentally playing it safe.
How were they going to shake things up and get out of this rut?
She reached Sans Souci and saw Billy’s truck parked out front, but no other signs of life. She scanned the snow-buried yard, uninterrupted billows of white all the way to the edge of the woods. They could be out back by the kitchen, or maybe they were still inside. They could still be fueling up with hot cocoa and tomato soup before tackling the near-zero temperatures.
“Hello,” she called as she pushed the door open.
No answer.
Well, it was a big house. She tried again, and again got nothing. She held her breath and listened for the usual laughter and shrieks. That was odd, for sure, because when Zack and Bean and Tyler played together, there was always lots of noise.
She stepped into the foyer and looked around for any familiar winter gear her kids might have tossed onto the floor. Nothing. So either they were still outside or they were still wearing it.
“Hello! Is anyone here?”
Maybe they were playing hide-and-seek. If so, she had her work cut out for her, because there were probably a million hiding places in this building.
It’s not that.
With crystal clarity, she knew that something was wrong. Just like that, her damn imagination kicked into gear and every horror movie she’d ever seen flickered through her brain.
With an effort that took all the mental discipline she had, she shoved those fears aside. She didn’t need to panic, not yet. This situation required her to think rationally and not drive herself crazy.
But what should she do? She had no idea what was going on. Should she call for help? What would she say? I got weird vibes at Sans Souci, please come immediately.
Her kids always ditched their winter gear as soon as they came inside. They must still be playing somewhere in the snow.
She went back outside, making sure not to let the closing door make a sound. Some instinct was telling her to move with stealth. Maybe it was a self-protective instinct, but wherever it came from, she was going to follow it.
Outside the house, she looked for footprints in the snow. But the only one she saw were on the shoveled path that led to the side kitchen door. She followed them, and as she came closer to the kitchen she saw piled up snow that definitely be the beginnings of a snow fort. They must be inside, oblivious to anything except their project.
When she reached the fort, she knelt down and peered inside.
Empty.
But there were plenty of footprints leading to the kitchen. She stepped closer and peered in the window.
Her heart just about stopped beating.
The scene she was looking at made no sense. Her whole family was there, a tableau of male Coopers. Billy slumped against the kitchen island, both forearms resting on it, as if he could barely keep upright. She tried to catch his eye, but his head kept lolling down. A horrible thought made her stomach clench. Was he drunk? In front of the kids?
Zack was plastered against Billy’s other side, but Jenna could only see the top of his blond head. It was unusual to see him cling to his father like that. He must be worried.
And Bean…Bean was clutched in the arms of a woman Jenna recognized as the Caldwell’s cook, Mallory. Her dirty-blond hair was loose from its usual beanie. She was dressed in velour leggings that Jenna would have envied under other circumstances. Their backs were to her; she could see Bean’s stocking feet dangling in the air.
Why was Mallory holding Bean?
Jenna hadn’t spent as much time with Mallory as she had with Soraya—Fun Nanny. Mallory had always seemed standoffish and uninterested in games and popcorn and so forth. She generally made the food and disappeared. Had she struck up some kind of friendship with her youngest boy?
Speaking of Soraya…Jenna looked around the room and saw her slumped in a chair in the corner, by the cozy hearth built into the kitchen. Tyler stood next to her, as if keeping guard over her.
