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“Haha, very funny.”I was pretty sure Travis lived alone, so there was no worry of us waking anyone up. I was starting to feel a little bit annoyed that everything he had to say had a sexual connotation. It was true that we had amazing sexual attraction, but I wanted to feel like he saw me as more than someone to hook up with.
“I had an idea.”
“What’s that?”
“Let’s choose a movie and watch it at the same time and then text each other our favorite and worst parts.”
“What movie?”
“You can choose.”
“Even a romance?”
“Even a romance. HAHA.”
“Fine. I’ll think about it and let you know.”
“Sounds good. I’ll text you later.”
“Okies.”
I put the phone into my handbag and made my way into the house. I was so excited that I started humming an old Missy Elliott rap song. I wanted to get my sisters’ opinions on what was going on with Travis. I knew they said he was a player. I knew they didn’t want me to get hurt. But I really wished they would understand that he was the first man in a long while that I’d felt a connection to. Granted, when I was around him in person, I didn’t feel much of anything, but that was because he was too good at pretending he was disinterested. As soon as I got into my bedroom, I grabbed my laptop and went to Netflix’s website. I needed to find a good movie for us to watch. I didn’t want a generic sweet romance. I wanted something funny. Maybe even a little sexy. I wanted something that would give us something to talk about. I was excited for the evening. I was excited to get to know Travis better, even if it was just via text. I had plans to ask him if he wanted to move it from text to an actual call. And then, if he was up to it, a video chat.
I didn’t mind flirting over the phone, but if we were going to get really dirty, I was going to need to hear his voice or see his face. I couldn’t touch myself or even think about him touching himself just to some words. I mean, I thought it was sexy, but it wasn’t a huge turn-on to me. Not like hearing his Southern voice would be. I was about to start playing one of the movies on my shortlist when my phone started ringing. It was Harriet. I had no idea why she was calling me, especially because I thought she was still in the movie theater.
“Hey,” she said in a low tone as I answered the phone.
“I thought you went to a movie.”
“I did, but I came to get some popcorn, and I was feeling bad, so I wanted to call you.”
“Feeling bad about what?” I asked as I lay back on my bed.
“What I said earlier.” She sounded sorrowful. “About the wrestling. I know you told me that in confidence years ago and I didn’t want to bring it up like I was judging you or anything.”
“Oh.” I laughed as I lay there. “Don’t worry about it. I’d already forgotten it.”
“You sure?”
“Uhm, yup. Can’t stand the Andretti brothers, remember?”
“But I saw you and Chandler looking at each other for a few moments.”
“I was thinking about how much I couldn’t stand his smug face,” I said quickly. “I certainly wasn’t thinking about that incident.”
“Good,” she said. “Plus, it’s not like you did anything.”
“Exactly,” I said softly, though a sudden memory hit me. “It was just one of those things,” I added quickly. “Anyway, get back to the movie. Enjoy.”
“Thanks, sis.” She sounded happier now. “I’ll talk to you later. Bye.”
“Bye,” I whispered and hung up the phone. My mind had gone back several years to the Andrettis’ living room. Jacob had been playing video games with one of his friends in his room, and I’d been watching TV with Chandler on the couch. He’d grabbed the remote control from me and changed the channel to football. I’d been upset and grabbed the remote back from him, which had led him to tickling me to get the remote back. I’d then thrown my leg over his to try and stop him, and we’d ended up wrestling on the couch before falling to the ground. We’d spent a good five minutes rolling around the ground, trying to take control of the remote. And then I’d been on top of him, laughing, trying to pin his arms down. Now that I was older, I understood that he’d let me overpower him. There was no way that I’d been stronger than him. I’d been straddling him when suddenly his legs had wrapped around my waist and I’d wiggled against him, trying to get out of his grip. And then he’d suddenly stilled. I hadn’t realized what was going on and had continued wiggling back and forth, but then I had felt it. He’d been hard and growing between my legs. And I’d felt a special warm feeling in my panties. It had been enjoyable, and I’d rubbed back and forth even more. And we’d just stared at each other. And with each movement, he’d grown harder and I’d grown wetter. I wasn’t sure how long we would have continued like that because Jacob had come running into the room and I’d jumped up and grabbed the remote control and hurried to the restroom. I’d never told Jacob or even spoken about it to Chandler. I mean, what did you say in a situation like that? “Hey, hon, I was play wrestling with your brother and he turned me on more than you ever have?” There was no way in hell I ever could have said anything to him. But it didn’t matter now. Jacob had turned out to be a jerk and a cheat, and I was pretty sure that his brother was no better.
8
Istared at the computer screen in front of me. I needed to make sure I had enough credits to graduate in the spring. I couldn’t believe that I was about to graduate college, and I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life. I felt like I wasn’t ready to enter the real world. I didn’t have any real dreams or goals when it came to a career, and that scared me. All my life, I’d been just going with the flow. Harriet had her art, Polly was into writing, and I was just the goofy sister, the one that supported them and praised them and cheered them on. I’d grown up being slightly coddled as the youngest, and I’d loved it. I knew without a doubt that my sisters loved me and would do anything for me. Same with my parents, even if they were absentminded. But I was fast realizing that I didn’t really know who I was.
I mean, I knew I was Chelsea Campbell. I knew I was possibly the craziest and most daring of the Campbell sisters, but I was also different. I didn’t have anything I was really good at. I didn’t have a boyfriend. I’d never even had sex. I’d never told anyone because I was slightly embarrassed, but I didn’t want to have sex with just anybody. I wanted to be in love. I wanted to give myself to someone that thought I was the most beautiful and wonderful woman in the world. It was romantic and possibly unrealistic, but that was what I wanted. I felt my head pounding slightly as I thought about Travis. I didn’t love him. I didn’t even really know him. While I enjoyed flirting with him, I wanted to get to know him much better before I was intimate with him. Though I knew that was the least of my concerns right now. I needed to come up with a plan for my life. Texting Travis was fun, but that wasn’t going to help me figure out what to do with my life.
