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“But it’s such a romantic story,” he teased me. “I can tell them that Mommy was about to be a stripper, and because I didn’t want everyone in Montana to see her boobs, I saved her.”
“Very funny, Chet.” I swatted him on the ass.
“Hey,” he said, “hoping for some happy-go-lucky time?”
“No, I’m not. We’re going to the kitchen, and we’re going to help your Mom bake this pie.”
“No, we’re not,” he said. “We’re going to the bedroom because I have something to give you.”
“Chet, I do not need you to go down on me. Thank you very much.”
“You know the doctor said it’s fine if we make love. I just don’t want my penis all up in there next to my baby.”
“But your tongue is okay?” I cocked my head at him.
“Well, my tongue is not reaching the same sort of places my penis is. I mean, yeah, I got a long tongue, but my dick is huge.”
“Chet. Oh my God.”
“What?” He grinned. “You don’t agree with me?”
I blushed. I didn’t want to feed his ego, but I couldn’t lie. He did have a beautifully well-proportioned penis, but I was not going to say that to him now.
“You cannot be saying these sort of things. You’re about to be a dad.”
“And a husband,” he grinned. “I’m really excited about Saturday, by the way.”
“Really? You’re not scared we’re rushing into anything?”
“I’m not scared. I’m happy. Now come with me to the bedroom.”
“But I told Eloise and your mom that—”
“You can go and help them in a minute, okay?”
“Fine,” I said. As we walk past the kitchen, I could hear Eloise and Amelia laughing about something. “This better be quick, Chet.”
“It will be quick. Don’t worry.” He winked at me.
“Chet, I told you, you’re not going down on me.”
“You want to go down on me instead?”
“No,” I laughed. He pouted, and I grinned at him. “Maybe tonight.”
“Oh yeah, baby.” He laughed. “But no, that’s not why I want you to come with me.”
We walked into his bedroom, and he closed the door. “I got these for you.” He handed me a dozen red roses.
“Wow, this is really nice. Thank you.”
“I wanted to give these to you before the wedding because I know you have a different bouquet and it’s not roses. But I wanted to give you red roses because I’ve never given you red roses before, and it’s kind of something you’re meant to do when you’re in love.”
I closed my eyes and breathed in the scent of the roses. “That’s sweet. But it’s fine, Chet. We kind of skipped a lot of steps before the marriage and baby thing, but I think it’ll be okay.”
“I know it will be okay, but I wanted to do things properly.” He walked over to the side of his room and opened his closet.
“What are you doing?”
