AllFreeNovel
Share Us
From then on, that’s what I felt with Carter: comfortable. I think he caught onto that, and being the person that he is, he took it upon himself to help me. I don’t know how many of the details he knew about me before I was adopted, but I imagine that Easton had spilled most of them. We’ve never talked about it, but I could always tell. To whatever extent, he knew. So, he always protected me in whatever way he could. However coy, however hidden, he protected me. From kids at school, from things he thought might trigger me (he would always change the channel when Marlena leftLaw and Orderplaying so I wouldn’t accidentally see a bloody, dead body), he even took my side in every argument I had with my brother. Sometimes I think that’s part of the reason they grew apart.
He protected me. He comforted me. Always.
As we got older, I wasn’t sure what it all meant. I don’t think he did either. It was an unexplainable yet delicate balance, he and I. Kind of like the way gravity, pressure, and heat work together to give us stars. And when the heat gives out, so does the pressure, then gravity takes over and it collapses in on itself, creating a blackhole. Nobody knows what happens after that.
I think that’s what happened when he kissed me.
We accidentally created a supernova. We collapsed into a blackhole.
As he’s standing in front of me now, I realize that I don’t know what happens in the aftermath.
“Alright, you want to tell me what this weirdness is with you and Mr. Carter?” Macie asked from the other side of the table, pulling me out of my thoughts. I looked down at the half-eaten croissant in front of me and shook my head. “The moment he walked through that door you became worthless for conversation,” she muttered. “He walks into a room and you go all Han Solo on me.”
I lifted my head and blinked at her. “Han Solo?”
“Yeah, frozen.” She fluttered her hands as if I should know what she’s talking about.
“I don’t understand the reference.”
She groaned, “Han Solo gets frozen in carbonite at the end ofThe Empire Strikes Back. God, Penelope, I’ve been telling you to watch these movies for years.”
“I’ve only known you for six months,” I snorted.
“Feels like years,” she murmured. “Anyway, I need to understand the history here.” She waved her finger between me and Carter, who was standing on the far side of the coffee shop. He hadn’t greeted me when he walked in, but I knew he saw me. “You’ve never mentioned anybody named Carter to me before. Then, a couple of weeks ago, this guy—very, very hot guy, might I add—comes walking into your classroom saying you’re old friends? Except, you must not be because after that you’ve hardly said a word to him, and you become a literal glacier every time he’s within your vicinity. There is tea here and I am going to need you to serve it.” Her rapid speech had her panting by the time she had finished.
I dropped my head in my hand. “Can you wait until he leaves?” I peeked at him through my fingers and saw him standing at the to-go counter waiting for his coffee, meaning he likely wasn’t staying inside. It had been two whole weeks since he showed back up, crashing head first into my life.
He is a bull, and my life is a china shop.
I’m honestly surprised Macie let it go this long without interrogating me about it, because the weirdness had been intense each time I was around him at work. I had a feeling this conversation was coming though, since we always met up for coffee on Wednesday mornings. The school district had classes delayed by an hour every Wednesday to accommodate budget cuts, meaning we had time to catch up during the week.
The barista called out Carter’s order and we both looked up at him. He glanced at me as he headed out the door and nodded.Of course, he’d be here. But I supposed that was the thing about living in a small town, there was only one good coffee shop in it.
I let out all the breath I had been holding in. “Okay,” I started. I explained to Macie my history with Carter. She already knew I had been adopted, but I explained how I had been adopted when I was seven. How my father and Carter’s were neighbors and friends, and how when we were little kids Carter and Easton were also friends. The day I was brought home, Carter was sitting on our front porch with Easton. How from that day forward he was always there. We were never best friends, but we were nevernotfriends, either. We just were whatever it was that we were.
“Then, around, I don’t know, twelve, I started having a crush on him. He’s always been tall, but he used to be skinny too. When he started hitting puberty, it was like the rest of his body caught up with him. His parents have a pool we spent a lot of time at in the summer and I had seen him a million times without a shirt on, but one day he walked outside and just looked different. After that, I noticed him in different ways. He is actually really funny. He’s smart too but doesn’t like people to know it. He’s got this easy demeanor that kind of makes everyone fall in love with him, but it’s more cute than it is annoying. He’s protective. Thoughtful–” I looked at Macie and noticed her grinning at me. I blushed. “Anyway, I just started having this big crush on him but I was way too timid and afraid to say anything. I knew he never felt the same way I did and that embarrassed me, so I kept it to myself.” She raised a brow at me but nodded. “Then, at our high school graduation party he just… he pulled me into a closet and kissed me.”
Macie’s eyes bugged. “He just casually pulled you into a closet and kissed you? And then what? Walked away?”
I chewed on the inside of my cheek. “No, more like I ran away.”
Macie laughed. “That sounds like you. What happened after that?”
I shrugged. “Nothing. I left for England the next morning. I didn’t see him again until last Thursday.” I ran my fingers through my hair. I noticed Macie hadn’t responded so I glanced up at her to find her mouth gaping open at me.
“I’m sorry, let me get this straight. You crushed on this kid for, like, your whole life pretty much. One day he randomly kissed you, knowing you were moving across the planet the next morning, and then you guys just didn’t speak again for years?”
“That about sums it up,” I murmured.
“Was it, like, a predatory thing?” she asked.
“What?” I gasped.
“Well, you said he pulled you into a dark closet and kissed you. It doesn’t sound like it was consensual.” She gave me a look that read a little confusion and a little concern.
“Oh, no. No, no. It wasn’t like that. I mean, yes, he pulled me into the closet, but at first he tried to just talk to me. He told me there was something he needed to do before I left, or he wouldn’t be able to live with himself–”
Macie gaped, “Oh my.”
