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Carter had this secret spot not far from his mom’s house that he claimed was the best on the island for watching the sunrise. The cove was rarely deserted, but it was far enough away from the touristy part of the island that it was almost never crowded.
Though this morning we seemed to have gotten lucky because we were the only two here. We walked hand-in-hand through the sand until we found a spot to settle in against a rock. The sky was just beginning to brighten along the eastern horizon, fading from midnight blue to a deep lavender that meshed with the color of the ocean.
I made to sit down when his hand stopped me. “Don’t sit yet.”
I blinked at him. “Why?”
His smile told me he had something up his sleeve. “Let’s take a walk.”
He led me toward the rocky embankment that jettied out past the cove. We tiptoed along the rocks, careful of the waves that splashed furiously against them. Once we made it to the end of the jetty, he stopped. Just above us the rocks leveled out to a flatter top, but getting up there would require about ten feet of climbing.
That was where his expression became known. He trusted the ocean wholeheartedly. He fully believed that if he fell off one of these rocks and into the water below, it’d bring him safely back to shore. Maybe not in a literal sense, but he believed that he had both enough skill and enough connection with the ocean that he had nothing to fear. It was a beautiful thing to believe in.
I, however, did not share that sentiment.
I didn’t like climbing, especially when falling likely meant my skull being crushed repeatedly against a cliff. I didn’t like the slickness of the rocks, either. I’d already been on edge just walking along the jetty. I jumped every time a wave crashed against my ankles, afraid it’d throw off my balance. He must’ve been reading my expression because he said, “Trust me, Pep.”
And I melted just enough that I nodded. He found the lowest place along the rock and hoisted me up so I could grab the upper ledge. I lifted one leg and pulled my upper body over the top. It was not lost on me that Carter had his hands on my ass the entire time. Though if I asked, he’d say he was holding me steady. I had to roll sideways across the top of the rock to get up completely, thankful that movement wasn’t witnessed by anyone when Carter then hoisted himself up with seemingly no effort at all.
I rolled my eyes as he sat down next to me, both of us letting our legs dangle off the edge. That midnight blue had completely disappeared from the sky as sparks of orange and pink took its place. I felt Carter’s eyes on me and as I turned to him, he said, “Do you remember when I promised I’d be on my knee proposing to you the moment you got your PhD?”
I stared after him for a moment, not wanting to let my brain get ahead of me when it considered where this conversation might lead. I held out my arm and looked down at my wrist as if I was checking a watch. “Sure do. It’s been exactly four days, twenty hours, and fifty-seven minutes since I graduated. You really dropped the ball, Edwards.”
He snorted as he shook his head. “I want it to be perfect, for whenever it does happen.”
I forced my smile not to falter as I felt a small twinge of disappointment. I hadn’t truly expected him to propose at my graduation, or even soon after. We were busy. More than that, we were happy– exactly as things were. I just received a full-time position withNational Geographic, while Carter’s begun free-lancing with them himself. We have the art studio to run too. Even if he were to propose, it wasn’t as if we had time to plan a wedding. We’d probably end up at City Hall.
Though, I couldn’t pretend it wasn’t something I was looking forward to. I always tried telling myself I wasn’t the kind of girl who cared to get married, but in truth, I only forced myself to think that way because I didn’t feel I was worthy of the type of love I knew should come with marriage. And after I found Carter, after I learned to love myself, I realized there was nothing I wanted more. There was nothing I wanted more than to be tied to him forever. Spiritually, physically, and legally, too.
“You could propose to me at the kitchen table, or in the back seat of an Uber, or while I was at the dentist, and it would still be perfect.”
He nodded. “I know.” He brought his arm up to my face and ran his thumb along my cheek. “But I just always imagined it a certain way. There is something some place that reminds me of you. Always has, even in the years I didn’t get to be with you. And even though we’ve already committed to each other for as long as the Universe allows us, I want that place incorporated when I actually put that ring on your finger.”
I looked up at him. “What’s that place?”
His hand moved from my cheek to the back of my neck as his grip tightened. He brought my head to his and whispered against my lips, “The sunrise on the beach.”
My pulse skyrocketed as he closed the gap between us. His lips moved against mine in an unhurried motion. I gave myself into the moment and leaned against his chest, melting into him entirely. When he pulled away, a small brown box was present in the palm of his hand.
“To me, the sun rising against the ocean is the most astounding natural element of the world. It represents new beginnings, opportunities, and fresh starts. It provides hope and beauty and makes me feel completely in awe of the world we live in and all the universe outside of it. It makes me feel overwhelmed with existence itself. It makes me feel grateful for that. For just simply existing, for being able to witness it at all.” We both looked out at the sea then. As if it was a canvas that had been splashed with every color imaginable, exploding right before our eyes. The orb of the sun was just starting to hover over the horizon line, shrouding everything in its path with gold. His hand still cupping my cheek, he guided my eyes back to his. “That’s how you make me feel, Penelope. You are the moon and stars to me, but you’re also the beginning of every new day. You make every moment feel like an endless opportunity. You are hope and beauty, and I am in awe of you. You overwhelm me in a way that I can’t describe, and I’ll be forever grateful that I get to watch you exist. I never want you to miss the sunrise because these are the only moments that I truly feel I can show you what I see when I look at you. That’s how I want you to see yourself.”
My throat had closed, choking back all of my tears, but as I watched one spill out of his eye and down his cheek, my own dam broke. I strangled sob ripped from me as I tried to laugh through them. I opened my mouth, trying to tell him how much I love him, but I wasn’t able to speak through my sobbing laughter.
Because I love him.God, I love him.
His hand moved to his lap and my eyes followed as I watched that little brown box open. An oval-cut emerald ring was cushioned within the box. Encased in a crown of diamonds on a silver band, the ring glimmered in the morning sunlight.
His hands were shaking as he pulled the ring from the box and held it out in front of him. “Will you marry me?” He was blurry through my tears, and my bottom lip was trembling so much that I couldn’t speak. I could only nod and hold out my own shaking hand as he slipped the ring onto my left finger. I raised my hand above us as we both watched gemstone dance in the reflection of the sunlight. “I got you an emerald because the color reminds me of your eyes, but if you’d prefer a diamond we can–.”
“It’s so beautiful,” I whispered. “It’s perfect.” I pulled my gaze from the ring to his eyes. A smile bloomed across his face as he looked after me. “I’ll never be able to put into words the way I feel for you, but it’s all here,” I said, placing my left hand over my chest. “Everything you feel exists inside me too. Loving you is the easiest promise I’ll ever make.”
He leaned into me as we tasted each other’s tears and felt each other’s smiles.
It was arguably the most perfect moment I’d ever lived, until he said, “Oh God, your initials are really going to be P.E.E.” His laughter was a melody. “I’m so excited to make fun of you for the rest of my life.”
“Ass.”
