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She takes a bite of steak and then points her fork at me. “You know I Googled him, right? He’s like a real-life Ken doll, except he can diagnose diseases and shit.”
I take a sip of the crisp Chinon and watch the red tornado in the glass. “He was really nice and—” I stop myself from using the wordlovely. “He was easy to talk to.”
“You make dating sound so dreadful. It’s like you’ve been single so long that you forgot how to find the good in meeting new people.”
“Tara,” I admonish, tilting back my wineglass and finishing the last drop. “I’m not built like you. I don’t have this burning need to be in a relationship. Eric is nice, and he sent a very nice text message, but that’s as far as I’m willing to go. My life right now is too complicated for a relationship.”
Her mouth opens in a surprised, excited gasp. “Let me see your phone!”
Begrudgingly, I pull my phone out, unlock the screen, and hand it to her.
She reads Eric’s text message out loud in a terrible impression of man’s voice. “I’m reaching out to let you know what a wonderful time I had last week at dinner. We said it was a meal between new friends, but I’m thinking about you a week later and I’d be a fool not to try and see if you’d be willing to go out with me again. The odds of you saying no are great. I’m willing to take the chance on having my ego crushed.”
Tara looks up from the text message with smashed lips and wide eyes, and I can hear her feet tapping on the ground in excitement.
“Jillian, you’re an idiot if you don’t give this guy a chance. How freaking sweet is this text message?”
“Very sweet,” I agree. “What happens when I date him for a while and it fizzles? It’ll have been a waste of time.”
“Who are you kidding with this drivel? Let me impart some wisdom on you. There’s no woman on earth who declaresI don’t need a manunless there’s a real-life man who scorned her. Whoever that guy is, fuck him.”
“That’s your advice,” I muse.
“Who are you sticking it to with thisI can do everything on my ownmantra anyway? Not your ex—that’s for damn sure. He’s probably out living his life and screwing everything that walks. You’re only screwing yourself.”
The thought of Luke bedding women over the years makes my stomach sour. I haven’t given thought to the reality that he’s been in relationships since we separated. He could be in one now.
“I’m not like you and Melissa. You rile each other up. I don’t need, nor do I want, that for me. Yes, I have issues like everyone else. I choose not to air them. That’s not the way I was raised. That’s not my style.”
“Your biggest issue is, you went too many years without a Tara and Melissa in your life.” Her gold bangles jingle as she talks. “You have this amazing, self-empowered aura about you, but that self-reliance can eat you up. Let me explain something to you. When Melissa’s ex-husband cheated on her, she gave up on love. Not because she didn’t want it, but because she didn’t want it to hurt her again. She convinced herself her children’s happiness was all that mattered. It wasn’t until she met Will that she realized she was still capable of loving despite being hurt.”
“Melissa’s story is one for the ages. Our stories are different. I wasn’t cheated on.”
I motion for the waiter to refill my wine glass.
Tara waits for the waiter to finish pouring our wine and then continues, “You’re very close to the vest with your past, and I respect that. But I don’t understand why you let it alter the rest of your life.”
“You’re starting to sound like my mother.”
“Hell no. Your mother thinks you need a man to conform to societal norms. I’m telling you to stop letting a man dictate how you live. This Eric guy might end up being a dud, but you say you had a nice time, and maybe if you give him a chance, he can turn out to be something more than a good dinner. Don’t let being hurt in the past and this drive to be the best mom and an independent woman hold you back from living your fucking life! Don’t let some man who made the biggest dick decision in letting you—a gorgeous, successful, talented woman with legs I’d kill for, hair people spend thousands to have, and eyes that are seriously envious—go, impact your life. Fuck him. Seriously, fuck that guy from your past by moving on and living in the goddamn present!”
A woman at a nearby table drops her water glass at Tara’s expressive declaration, and I close my eyes in mortification while still getting every word she said.
I take a long sip of my wine and drink in her words.
All these years, I’ve been closing myself off as a scornful vengeance to Luke. I shouldn’t continue to put my life on hold just because he’s suddenly made an appearance. If he weren’t here and I had that date with Eric, it’s possible I would have given Eric a chance for a second date. At least after hearing such a powerful speech from Tara, I’ll give it serious consideration.
“I can see why Melissa keeps you around.”
She holds her glass in the air and scowls. “There are many reasons, but an elaboration would be nice.”
“You know how to strike a match and light a fire under someone’s ass.”
“So, you’re going to go on a second date with the doctor?”
“I’m going to stop letting a jerk from the past decide how I spend my future.”
Tar’s positively giddy as she takes a drink and lifts my cell phone from the table. My heart races as she looks up from my phone, the light of the screen illuminating her face as she gleams with a devilish grin.
