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He’s not romantic. He’s not meant for forever. He’s not mine.
Even after a moment like we just had, where I imagined, for just a second, he could be.
“Let’s go get some real dinner,” I say to my summer family. “Funnel cake was good and fun, but we need something real.”
Suddenly, I wonder if I’m talking about something other than what we need to eat.
CHAPTERFIFTEEN
“How much longer are you going to make me do manual labor?” Jesse asks at the top of the ladder, where he’s cleaning the castle walls.
We’ve resorted to officially calling itthe castlewhile we fix it up. Jesse is working on the outside, doing a spectacular job with the supplies we have. Molly is cleaning the inside while I’ve been elbow deep in weeding.
I found the keys to a four-wheeler Rob keeps in the shed, so we’ve been driving pails of water back and forth to the site. Jesse is more than happy to make the trips since driving a four-wheeler is hella fun.
“Don’t act like you’re not enjoying this. It’s nice out here, and it beats going to work with your dad—or better yet, having me tell him you lied about driver’s ed.”
Jesse grunts at me, and I laugh.
“Besides, Molly and I are out here too. You hear us complaining?”
“That’s because you’re both equally weird.”
The long ponds in the front of the castle are nearly cleared out. I’ve been throwing the weeds into the nearby woods. My hands are hot and sweaty under the rubber gloves I’m wearing, but it’s better than ruining my manicure, and I have no idea if what I’m pulling out is poison ivy.
“It looks good in here!” Molly sings from inside the upstairs room.
She’s been sweeping for the last hour. Before that, we gave her the leaf blower and let her go to town with dusting out the place, removing cobwebs, scaring off a few mice, and getting rid of the general muck that had accumulated over the years of neglect. She loved the task, and the inside rooms were cleaned up quickly.
There’s still some charge left in the leaf blower, so I use it to remove excess foliage around the paths leading up to the wooden door. The machine eventually dies, so I go back to weeding.
The overgrown shrubs are something that will wait another day. I may need a chain saw.
It’s only been a few days of making improvements, and the transformation is already incredible.
“Dad is going to love it!” Molly beams as she sweeps debris to the outside of the castle.
“No, he’s not,” Jesse scoffs, and the two of us look up at him. “He never comes out here. When we first bought the house, he was over here all the time with his sketch pad, but since he and Mom broke up, he doesn’t even look in this direction.”
I pause my weeding and think about what he said. “Did he plan to reimagine the castle for your mom?”
“Mom hates this place. I don’t mean the castle. I mean the entire ranch. I think …” He pauses and then shakes his head, as if what he was going to say was inappropriate. He looks over at Molly and then shrugs. “Never mind.”
Molly rolls her eyes. “I’m ten, but I’m not an idiot. I know what you’re gonna say, Jesse.” She looks over at me and explains, “He thinks Mom convinced Dad to buy the ranch, so when she left him, Dad would have a place to go.”
My head snaps to Jesse. “Seriously?”
His eyes widen at Molly. “How do you know that?”
“I heard you say it to Mom once. You’re not exactly quiet when you’re arguing. I know a lot of your theories.”
“They’re not theories. You were too young to hear the fights and see the events as they unfolded,” he bites back.
“I heard more than you think, Jesse.”
“Then, you know Mom didn’t like it here when Dad said he wanted to buy it. She told him no, and then suddenly, she changed her mind. Even after they bought it, she came once. Dad took us here alone. He fixed up this house while watching us. Mom was never here. A few months later they separated. Do you get what I’m saying?”
I blow out a loud breath. Watching your parents go through a tumultuous divorce must be horrible. It’s no wonder Jesse’s so damn moody. It’s a surprise Molly isn’t. These kids have been privy to too many of their parents’ secrets.
